#but. as much as it could be in there for his situation I think its in there

[m4mmonthebest]

So just found your blog and i absolutely love it <3 Imnso insane for these objects ahkdjdj anyway hot take i think Cam and Dorian are size queens. Cam just loves being filled ;)

GRRRR R ARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

(AMAB Cam, AMAB reader.)

Okay so let's start with Cam. As I've said before he's kinda made to be filled in a way. I think he would be super cocky, thinking he can handle any size. Once you pull out your cock (or a toy, let's go with cock) he smiles but visibly gulps. You can see a sweat drop slowly rolling from his forehead.

"Hah. G-go ahead. See if that phases me. Could barely fill me anyway."

He's wrong. God he's so wrong. Just half of you in has him panting.

"F-fuck you're not fully in- fuck-"

He grips whatever is closest to him like his life depends on it. On this occasion it's yourself. He latches onto your back, nails digging deep. You keep pushing, his mouth hangs, eyebrows deeply furrowed, you can hear him making small noises, you're not sure if they're from pleasure or pain. Probably both.

"A-Ah...a-ah fuck-fuck you-"

You move out and you can feel the air leaving his lungs. He makes a choked out noise, between a cry, sob and a moan.

"A-Ah!!!"

When you start fucking him like you mean it he's a stuttering blabbering mess. Every type of noise comes out of him, noises he probably would never want anyone to hear. You're just too damn big. He fucking loves it. It hurts so good.

Tears begin to form on his eyes and he begins to chuckle, legs tremble with every pound, he grabs you tightly and bites your neck hard enough to draw blood. His moans are whiny, like when you laugh too much and you're out of breath and it hurts so much to laugh but the situation is too damn funny.

"Hah! Hah! F-fuck I love you! Please please ugh please hah ha- fuck!! Fuck... Ngh!"

You're relentless, he can barely let a moan out before he comes hard, painting your stomach. You can tell how much he feels it, his legs shake wildly, whole body spasming as he holds onto you for dear life. He screams , a guttural scream. If you didn't know better you'd be worried, but you just laugh.

It takes a while for him to stop shaking, he pants wildly, and when you pull out he moans. He clenches on nothing, ass agape dripping your seed.

"You handled me, good job."

He looks proud of himself, chuckling. He whines. The pain is catching up to him. He reaches his arms out to you, eyes closed and face flushed red, you can still see the tears glistening on his skin.

"You want cuddles?"

"D-don't make me say it..."

"Hm. Just because you took me so well."

----------

(How do you write British people help)

(AMAB Dorian, AMAB Reader)

Trap Dorian is very excited to see you. You would ask if he had something in his pants but that is clearly a dick.

"Hey love... here for some friendly fun?"

You grab onto his waist, pressing him up to your body. You're a bit taller than him. He likes that a lot.

"Hm. I'd love to."

Ever since you've started to date Dorian you've noticed how he blushes when you brush past him. You never wanted to break boundaries, as he is a dedicated man to his job, but you felt like he wanted more. Longer touches. Rougher touches.

Your fingers travel through his body, lingering on his tattoos and resting on his pecs. You gently massage his nipples as your tongue plays with his own.

He moans loudly and dirty, you can feel desperation on the kiss, like he wants to eat you whole. Or maybe he wants you to do that to him.

He feels your hardness through your pants and can't help but gasp, looking down at it.

"Fuck you're big."

"Is that a problem?"

"No. Not at all."

You can feel hearts popping out of his words, your mouth catches onto his as you manhandle him to the floor. You grope his ass roughly through his pants, he bites your lip as a reply.

Foreplay is quick, both of you want to get to the point, which is your cock up his ass.

As you stroke your dick he readies himself, two fingers already making its way inside of him. You can hear him moan as he gives you a show. His voice is low and soft but there's a hint of neediness in it. You're sure that if you told him to keep fingering himself and to come just from his fingers he would do it without complaining.

Your cock rests on his taint and he can't help but swallow hard.

"Mighty thing you got there..."

"Think it will fit all in?"

"Only one way to know love...."

The fingers come out, and you make sure to tease the man as much as possible. He takes the teasing, not without hitting you with the cutest puppy eyes he is able to. Fuck. How can a grown man be so cute?

When your cock slowly makes its way inside of him he growls. You kiss his forehead, he seems impatient though as he forces more inches of you onto his body. You moan out loud, louder than you intend to do which earns you a chuckle from the man below.

"F-fuck that feels nice, love how you feel- ngh inside of me."

You let him adjust to the size, one of his hands teases his cock slowly, painfully so. He seems to have made his mind up, he'll come by your cock only.

Your movements at first are slow, he's a big man, so he takes the fullness surprisingly well. Not without its fair share of whines and breathy moans.

"Good boy Dorian..."

He clenches hard around you, cock twitching wildly at the words. He looks at you with pleading eyes as he bites his lip softly. Sounds escape his mouth, they make you even harder, although for some reason you're filled with affection for Dorian. The way he looks at you, he's asking for it.

You caress his face with both hands, face hovering over his, lips barely touching. You can feel his breath on you. You're hitting his right spots, you can tell by the high pitched moans you're dragging out of him.

"You like that...? When I call you a good boy? My....good boy?"

He lets a whine unbecoming of a serious man like him. He tries to look away but you don't let him.

"Y-yes ah! Please- oh - please call me- call me that..."

One of your hands is busy running your fingers through his hair, sticky sweat on the strands, while the other makes sure his face feels loved. You kiss him tenderly. He moans indecently.

"You're always doing such a good job....such a good job for me....keeping me protected. Let me make you feel good. Okay puppy?"

You didn't think it would happen that fast and just because of your words (although it wasn't just your words. You were going at quite a fast pace, hitting his prostate in all the right ways) but he comes undone with a loud dragged out moan. His back bends, and you decide to kiss him as he rides his high.

You continue pounding onto him, although a bit slower, you feel it inside you, the desire to cum. But something catches you off guard, you see Dorian looking to the side with a bit of a sad expression.

"Are you okay Dorian?"

You think about stopping but he latches his strong legs onto you, not letting you pull out.

"N-No. Keep going. Come in me, please ..."

You'll talk about it later, his begging face doesn't let you say no to it. You adjust your speed so you're again at the bring of release. And with one kiss filled with affection, you spill your seed inside. You can feel him gripping you tighter, arms hugging you close to him.

You stay like that for a couple of minutes. You pamper his face with kisses, which he lets you happily. Although you can tell something is nagging him.

"...will you tell me what's going on?"

"... It's... It's silly really."

You gently rest a hand on his face, he melts under your touch.

"It's not silly if it's making you upset. Did-did I do something wrong?"

He looks taken aback.

"What? No. Not at all. It - It was me."

"But you didn't do anything...?"

"I..." He tried to avert your gaze but you follow his eyes. His beautiful eyes.

"I just. Um. Didn't like coming first."

You take a bit of time to process it, which just makes him try and break from your embrace.

"N-No wait Dorian. You didn't do anything wrong! I told you I wanted to please you, didn't I?"

He looks down.

"Aren't...aren't I made to serve you?"

"Oh Dorian..."

You hug him tightly, you're glad you're a bit stronger than him, because you're able to make him lay in bed again. He didn't fight, part of him was telling him that he messed up.

"I love you, you know that?"

"...I love you too."

"You're not made to serve me. I know you always want me to be content...which is what I want you to be too. Making you feel good ... makes ME feel good. Okay?"

He looks into your eyes, and he can tell you're being truthful. He begins to blush, more than he wishes to, and you can't help but think he's the cutest person in the world. Your lips meet his, and he embraces you again.

You stay a while like that, you can't tell how much time.

You'll make Dorian realize he should also let himself be pampered from time to time.

[kannady]

do you remember me too?

pairing: sylus x mc reader

synopsis: love and deepspace was a newfound obsession of yours. you installed the game shortly after sylus was released as a love interest. it'd be safe to say he was the reason you installed the app. however, finals week was approaching and you had to say goodbye to your favourite game. not for long, ofcourse. but you decide to login for the last time to check the new event.

word count: 1.4k

a/n: hey everyone! i think im gonna finish this series before i write anything else now. this fic is so, so close to my heart. its not only my first ever work, but also smth i never run out of inspiration, ideas and determination of. i hope you enjoy this update and im sorry if i kept you waiting for long. lemme know what you think!

check out all chapters here

Chapter Eight

Normal.

That was one word your new life could never be described as. Yet somehow it was.

Everything was normal now. Your job as a Hunter was normal. Your regular check-ups with Zayne were normal. Catching a glimpse of Xavier on his way home was normal. 

It felt like years had passed since you’d come here. You’d never forget the initial excitement and confusion, of course, that was unmatched. But why were you getting used to everything and that so soon?

Your first Wanderer encounter had been, well, as one would say “easy peasy lemon squeezy”. By now, you’d defeated dozens of Wanderers with natural efficiency. Something your co-workers envied, something that Jenna praised. 

Although you believed you could fight Wanderers just fine on your own, you’d come to realise and eventually accept that at the moment, your Evol was far too weak. Due to the mysterious Protofield created by the Wanderers, it was required by the Hunters Association that two Evolvers must be present to support each other. But you couldn’t let anyone find out about your situation. 

However, every time you were in battle, Xavier was by your side. It seemed to you that he was doing all the supporting. He was Lumiere, after all. 

You’d even tried resonating with him once, and as expected, the results were nonexistent. But his expression was still etched in your memory like a burn. He looked disappointed, confused, surprised. Whatever it was, he never asked you to resonate again and you never approached that matter. And that was how you preferred it now, considering how you couldn’t properly use your Evol. 

The first couple of weeks you were convinced you didn’t have it at all. Until the mundane lessons with our sister finally bore fruit, even if a tiny one. The tiny water drop she conjured was twice its size and now months later, it was about four times its original size. Progress was slow, but you mind it as long as there was progress. How you’d managed to hide your little “Evol catastrophe” despite being a Hunter, was something that eluded you.

But still, after spending months here, something always felt empty, hollow, an endless pit of vacancy. You could never put your finger on it and with time you learned to stop caring. Initially, you were ecstatic to be inside your newest obsession, to have a chance to meet your most favourite fictional character. As much as it felt like a crime to say it out, you just didn’t care anymore.

You were still alive, thanks to someone who unknowingly gave up their life for you. But it always left you wondering. Would she still do the same if she knew who you were? If she knew it’d just be a different version of her.

However, you always brushed away that thought disguising it as a moment of doubt. A weakness you couldn’t afford to show. Whoever it was that brought you here, still didn’t know and that was how you’d love to keep it.

You loved Sylus. You truly did. And now that he was real, you loved him too much and maybe that was your fault. You had tried to call him, to make him come to you. But that was months ago and you couldn’t even remember why you’d done that. You stopped peering out the window every other hour, stopped waiting by the door, stopped rushing up to your room hoping to see an open window and a present on your bed.

Was he never going to come? Or were things inevitably going according to the game? Would you only meet him if your entire family died in front of your eyes, just an arm’s reach away from you?

“Hello! Earth to (reader)!” Someone sing-songed, pulling you out of your everyday midlife crisis.

Tara was the spitting mirror image of her game counterpart. Short, brunette hair styled in a bouncy bob. Those same brown eyes and bubbly personality. She was one of the few elements of this new life that you truly appreciated with no catch. 

“Oh, hey! When did you get here?”

“Just now. I think Captain Jenna’s gonna send us to some mission. Oof, why did I think Friday would be a slow day?” She pouted and plopped on the chair beside you. 

“What do you mean? What kind of mission?”

“I don’t know, but she was walking very fast and she had that ‘I’m not gonna let you rest for a minute’ expression on her face!”

You burst out laughing, earning a few headturns and murmurs from your co-workers. You laughed till you felt the corners of your eyes tear up and your stomach hurt. “Oh, God! Do you watch Captain Jenna that closely?”

She sat upright, her cheeks reddening, clearly offended by what you said. “Hey! It’s just my observation,” closing her eyes and placing her hand on her chest, she continued, “A Hunter’s most powerful skill and weapon.” 

“Right.” You managed to speak while stifling your laughter. But your bickering was cut short, when you heard the doors open. Jenna walked in with her usual stern expression, closely followed by Xavier.

“Everyone, gather round please.”

You heard the shuffle of quick footsteps as everyone walked up until you and Tara were surrounded by a dozen more people. Taking a deep breath, Jenna spoke up. “Yesterday, we sent Team Cosmos to explore and report any potential dangers of the No-Hunt Zone 2…” She trailed off and lowered her gaze. 

You vaguely remembered the senior Hunters who’d been selected for this mission. Out of all your seniors, only the best of the best had been selected. You’d seen them training, all of the weapons assembled for the mission, the newly formulated battle tactics.

They were strong, stronger than any Hunter you’d come across. Except perhaps Lumiere. But what had happened? Did something go wrong?

“Yesterday, we lost contact with them at 11:37 PM. We don’t know exactly what happened or where it happened.”

You felt Tara stiffen up at these words, you turned to look at her and weren’t mistaken when you saw the sheer horror struck on her face. You were beginning to understand the mission now. You were supposed to retrieve the lost Hunters. But how could junior Hunters like you manage that when they had to go through weeks of strenuous training. 

Maybe everyone was thinking the same thing. Perhaps reading the mood, Jenna further went on. “We need to retrieve these Hunters as early as possible, this is why you’re being assigned to the mission. You will be guided by your seniors at all times, so refrain from wandering away on your own. Stick to your group and more closely, with your partners.”

“I have shared the files with you. Please check your Hunter’s Watch and give them a thorough read. If you have a ny question, please don’t hesitate.” With this, Jenna looked around the room, making sure to hold eye contact with every single one of you. Then, with a final reassuring nod, she walked out. 

The moment she was out of sight, everyone began whispering and murmuring to themselves, while you and Tara stood glued on the spot. Retrieve the lost Hunters. The Hunters that had received the best training possible, that left with the most top-notch weapons, that’d been slaying Wanderers for years now.

What possibly could they have encountered? Why was the Hunters Association sending junior Hunters for this suicide mission? You’d never expected them to do something so reckless.

As you raised your arm to read the documents, Tara swhispered. “(Reader), maybe for this mission we can-”

But before she could finish, you heard Xavier clear his throat, almost giving you a jump-scare and whiplash from how fast you turned your head. 

Where did he come from!?

“When you’re done reading, meet me outside. We’ll leave in an hour.”

With that he vanished just as quickly he’d appeared. You could swear you’d just blinked your eyes for a microsecond. 

Sighing, you sank into the nearest chair and clicked your watch to read the files. No-Hunt Zone 2 was an abandoned research facility that had been initially operating under Luminex Technologies. You’d read about it before, but now you were getting a foreboding feeling. You were intrigued by the attacker, captor, the predator. But that didn’t mean to send you off for this suicide mission. 

Hell, you weren’t even given a choice to back out now. 

Xavier’s words rung in your ears. You had less than an hour now and you were terrified.

Lemme know if you wanna be on the taglist!

tags: @zenbutnotreally, @godoffuckedupcats, @noxus123, @madam8, @agustdxjiminx, @liz9898, @lemonn015, @tearydamsel, @diegojeanne, @alyssac9, @dummiebunny, @acesgarden, @bigclownshoes, @sylusgirlie7, @roseyjean, @poptrim, @pillarofsnow, @rxelarailuj, @brekkers-whore, @one17, @cchiiwinkle, @babyx91, @mourning-into-dancing, @yuhuahuaaa, @stxrrielle, @tapiokay, @glassandhoney, @animelover18, @paper--angel, @plzdonutpercieveme, @coffeedragonhobbyist, @likewhyareyousoobsessedwithme, @harbingers-lullaby, @sleepykittyenergy, @syluslovesicker, @solmanel1, @000rpheus, @theshadowsdragon, @silkyspiders, @moonlight-inthe-sea, @thebambi5555, @starllight613, @abbyeey, @mcdepressed290, @lluvia1415, @54fangirl, @batgirliee, @napforalifetime, @hughugh20, @mononlogue, @nisarelle, @nightmarewasteland, @yourlocalcatscammer

[sapphiccup]

Burning Blue...

Word count: 12k plus

Pairing: Abby x reader

Cw: Slow burn <3 series…. //light panic attacks descriptions, awkward conversation, highly suggestive, combat sparing, PTSD, use of cannabis, Abby's a perv, warning there will be nsfw in later chapters, flames, Malnourished Abby for the first few chapters, trust issues, anxiety, gay awakening for Abby? Did I say angst? yep, gay stuff. MDNI AND CIS MEN -> DNI!

Summary: This rose has thorns, yet she still grew from the cracks of the earth, only you take the step to water her roots, and pluck her weeds. Pricked again and again, and.. again. Until she finally lets you in on one condition: keep an eye on him.

Dc!:@/mmadeinheavenn

Song: Burning blue by Mariah the Scientist🧪💎

Chapter 1…ᖭི༏ᖫྀ

Nursing you Back to life

Over time there was one thing Abby took notice of when it came to you. Other than you nagging her to go out and mingle with people. Especially teaming up with Lev to encourage this... But this one thing overpowered those situations. You had a scent about you that she doesn’t come across often, this scent of yours twirled its way up her nostrils, it’ll cling onto her clothes, and best of all it lingered. It was as if you owned perfume. Real perfume, like it was the old times, but it wasn’t perfume. Spinning her head in all the right ways. It stirred up emotions that she thought she killed off for everyone; from how warm it would make her feel a sense of safety to be around you. No matter what time it was or where you guys were, the scent you carried helped so much. This constant call she would dial in her mind, finally being answered silently. Sometimes she thought she was weird for thinking a scent could hold so much power over a human being. Before she would have said that this is a myth, but.. It’s not. Dreams of her dad, flashes, noises, even scents now.. she gets it; she understands it.  Certain scents remind her of what she did, and it twists and squoze her stomach in ways that tell her  ‘remember when you did this’ . To a point where she could kneel and hold herself until the thoughts stopped berating her. Until you. Until you show up, it’s a breath. A long breath that she does not have to hold. A simple deep in and out. It danced slowly with her, just as with you and her relationship. Slow and steady. You never grabbed her hand and pulled her in the deep end like a whirlpool, in fact you were teaching  her how to swim again. And right now, she’s in deep waters. The kind of waters that you don’t try to swim towards. The deep dark abyssal zone. Her demons wrapped around her as if their arms were the heaviest of chains made of osmium. Her heart ached deep, like the water passing through her, barely able to take those freeing breaths. It was simply lonely.. No spark, no fire, no wood, nothing. The numb of it all consumed her. Reciting to her that ‘ this IS what you deserve.’  What hurt the most for her is that she never questioned it, only accepted it as it was.

Like what’s the point?  As she took another drag from her joint. We don’t question the deep, we only let ourselves drown in it until it suffocates us enough to swim back up only to breathe a moment of air. The cycle of once was tainted by experience, tainted by the memories that you tunnel vision on. And Abby was painted in blue, injected her blood stream with every drag of her strain that she picked up from some passing travelers. Traded for a necklace that they apparently needed to make up for something … ridiculous. Not that Abby remembers she just didn’t care enough to know the whole story as that man rambled on and on of his issue to her. She figured it would distract her. It’ll help her in this time of need however. Weed only expands the current emotion of a living being.  Her hypothesis of a distraction quickly underestimated that strength of this particular strain. Her heart rate, pedaled, her mind– scattered, her strength, brittled. Gathering locks of her hair from her scalp, as little as it may be now, enough for her to pull. Eyes shut, scared to open to go back to the shadows of her stained in red decisions. The heart she carried heavy— - with drums playing for the world and her trying to shut it up.  To break those sticks and burn them with any light she had, yet she not understands her light has been put out by many things, and many phases of she. 

One leg close to her chest, the other laid flat on the hard cold gray maple. Abby sat in a corner of her home that the village had given to her, enough space for Lev and herself. She sat there telling herself she does not deserve the luxury of a home. However, Lev being there reminds her she needs to provide for him, his home taken from him from the same place she used to think was home. Though, he isn’t here today, staying over at a friends house tonight. 

Abby is overjoyed that he made a friend. At least he has something after you took away his only family from him, a  thought chimed in her mind, and then another, Yeah- Abby at least they have friends, not like how you scattered us towards the beyond for your selfish obsession of a choice to kill Joe Miller., Another jab at herself imagining that her friend is spitting at her. How dare you have a family after mine was destroyed by your fire of a forest, pulling me along with your shit. You’re a fucking monster Abby, a monster!, a cannon in Mel’s voice  directly hitting her in the gut. Another long drag from the joint, wrapping her lips around the brown rolled leaf, deeply inhaling its addictive concoction.  – Hoping, wishing, praying,  that these thoughts will stop, but they just keep going. Festering her like an open wound with hundreds of maggots chewing the flesh, and decaying the veins of her despair.  Abby, I loved you. wh-  , Owen's voice was the last straw. Her jaw twitched with swift irritation passing by.

 Her joint now forgotten– - as she cried out a scream so loud her body rattled, gripping on to her locks harder with both hands on either side of her head. An extermination to the noise in her mind. Screaming until she unraveled, screaming until she felt a tiny bit of warmth, then hot… Really hot..? Extremely hot! Her nose scrunched by the scent of smoke, too much smoke.

“ABBY!?” a shout was near, but not near enough. Boom, her door went, BOOM– BOOM- again and again, and crashed, the door swung open, hinges bent, weeping from the force. 

Your eyes round, in shock that the house you’d visit from time to time was now  surrounded by the colors of yellow and red flames. 

Abby’s head whipped towards you, her face panicked, eyebrows finding purchase of higher than usual, her eyes shot out, her fist clenched. Though, when she realized it was you, she settled. Like a broken down shed  with a rusty roof, settling after a storm. When you entered her house, Hareton Salvanini- Quarto de Hotel immediately started playing, heavens gates were opened, with each step you took, a note played, in sync. Of course, her record player burned from the expansion of these conjured flames. Coughing, and nearly blind by smoke, yet you manage to walk through it all.

You found Abby in a corner, she cradled herself as if she was a child, a child with torment welled up inside…The curtains, aflame, a joint laid at the hem of the curtain, you beelined for it and stomped it out. Didn’t do much but, taking it and stuffing it into your pocket  does much more grace for Abby than she’d think later. The council would have a field day with this news, so why not help her a bit, or a lot – as you drag her by the under of her arms out the damn house. Abby's face was in a daze as if she was here but not here, in the space between hell and heaven, yet not earth. Her jaw slightly slacked, taking the tiniest bits of breath, eyelids half opened, she was gone. 

-

Abby was greeted by bright lights, birds chirped their automatic song, other birds chiming in. 

She laid on an unfamiliar bed, her ears were red like roses, her stomach fell inside of her, sunken, like an anchor, setting down in her vast deep memories recalling what happened, your face, your welled up tears, and then darkness. Ashamed of herself not from the lack of her being alive, no— from you seeing her in that state of wreckage. 

“Of course you’d see me like this..” she said groggily, sucking her teeth, scrubbing down  her face, heaving a long sigh already exhausted from another lie she will probably have to come up with to tell you again. Her hand rested on her face, not parting from her own warmth. Yet, you disregarded that comment she made. Forget any protest she has, you're just happy she’s alive and maybe … Maybe she’s okay. But, that image..  That image of her and her expression of pure fear back at her amber lit home.. in your mind. it doesn’t disappear – no – it stays, and places itself in a mural for your museum of a brain. 

“Abby..  ” 

“I know.-I .. I know there’s something you’re not— telling me,”You contended, your throat feels close to dry as you try to speak. She laid there, eyes baggy, lips red, her nose puffy, she carried tired and sad like a basket full of whatever could fit. More like an overstuffed duffle bag with a beaten up strap barely hanging on. Your body leaned in towards her, and there it was, that scent that Abby could never forget even if she wanted to. 

“Never mind me..” she said groggily, as she slowly rose up from the bed, and you abruptly stopped her. Guiding her to lay back down again, and of course Abby tried to force herself up, but your touch melts her to just give in and lay back down.

“Never mind you? Um— Abby.. do you not realize what situation just transpired? I’m minding the hell out of you.” A stifled laugh trespasses her nostrils, shaking her head at your statement. She knows you mean it, especially from the way you furrowed your brow just now. You never heard her laugh before, you didn’t think she could, and that’s when it hit you. Whatever mask Abby has been wearing around you.. It’s finally cracking, you sat there in a chair watching it pick itself apart. 

“Wow.. I really hit the deep end,” she began, as her trembling hand traveled up to her forehead, it was wet, some sweat and the other substance was– water..? Her sight cuts to the corner of her eye, seeing a nightstand with a metal kidney bowl sitting on top of it, there's a wet towel in it… her sight cuts back to you, and she’s shocked. Why would you take care of me? 

How could you not though? You were worried therefore you acted, did whatever you could, and figured.. You should help in any way you can. Not only to wipe the sweat from her forehead ( and did not want to wipe her whole body down because… that would just be too odd.. And you really don’t want to ruin her safety with you) but you have been wiping her face down for hours to prevent any hot flashes. 

Abby’s teeth dragged across her quivered lip. “I fucked up again..” 

You wondered, what did she mean by that.. However you choose not to interrupt. “I shouldn’t be surprised but I did.. I fucked up, and you– you  saw me. You— shouldn’t have seen me like that. That’s not how I–”

“Fuck..” She grunted out, her eyebrows drawing together mulling over what she thought happened, not yet really understanding how she ended up here, but she just doesn’t care, she’s being seen in a vulnerable state of being. That information, enough, makes her want to grind her teeth in annoyance. Her arm found purchase over her eyes.  “Before I even came here I promised myself that I would get my act together.. I promised. I- I-.. I thought. I thought I could do this. —--I’m like sisyphus.” she lets out, voice breaking her words ever so often.

You let out a little jortle, not meaning to. Which definitely caught Abby’s attention. Removing her arm back to her side, deadpan mounted her face. “I’m sorry.. It’s just.. Only you would make that reference.”  you said, slightly teasing her from past jokes she’s made before,  waving yourself off, silently telling her don’t mind you. Yeah, she’s definitely minding it. 

“Corny?” she asks you with a playful smirk. 

“A bit.. “ you answered honestly, rocking your body side to side, crinkling your nose. She rolled her eyes, giving you a light tap from the back of her hand “You’re such a prick..” 

“I’m sorry? Am I the one spiraling while also making references about greeks?” 

“Yeah whatever.---Got you to laugh.”

“And that you did” 

“Where are we?” She inquired, It’s not the medical center, with the lack of a doctor coming in letting her know what’s what. “ A friends house. One of the twins from the village; it was the best decision because I figured you wouldn’t want everyone in your business.” Even though Abby has become a little out of place, hearing that from you grounded her.

-

Laughs and slight hiccups soon faded and turned for the serious after Abby recovered. You may have been able to conceal some things, but that house can never be tucked under a blanket.  A council meeting was needed to be held. They never had such a big hiccup in the Village for an extensive amount of time . Plus, with Abby being new and all, this was bound to be had… rules needed to be established. Though, this rule frustrated the both of you. 

The ceiling was far above 16 feet, the sun beaming its way through through the multiple windows, groups of people gathered in certain areas murmuring amongst each other. This place you both were in resembled what they would call a courtroom though it was a simple middle school gym now transformed into the main area for parliament. A jury was set, of course the real deciders  are the several councilmen that sat before the both of you. You both stood with hands behind  your back, posture straightened out, head held high, ready to hear whatever will come next. 

A suggestion was thrown at the pair of you, hitting you both right in the back of your heads. The suggestion was so ridiculous there was now way in hell that it would just be agreed upon. No absolutely not– this will not bode well especially with the way you’re about to spill buckets of sweat from such a suggestion. Rubbing your hands together, feeling the increased heart beats rattling against your chest as you tried making sense of all of these decisions, and protocols. It felt like a losing game to even try to protest further. Yet, you still opened your mouth to nip this issue in the bud. However, Abby beat you to the punch.

“What do you mean.. I’m moving in with her?” Abby questioned, her tone sewn with shakey waver, gesturing towards you with a single hand, heightening your psyche alerting your ears to burn, and your eyes to steal a glance of her. Of course, you are happy, but also scared, but also what the hell is wrong with her being upset about it? You being upset about it is one thing, but wow. You’ve been the main one she’s regularly spoken to. At least have some kind of filter.. Or at least not sound so repugnant over the decision.

“According to your recent fiasco of a situation, while also housing a child–”

“He wasn’t present for that situation!” she parried back loudly, thunderous voice echoed in the room, which only made the jur murmured more. She already knows where this discussion will lead to. Her heart sank lower than it already has. The feelings churned in her stomach, as her throat bobbed from the next anticipated words that will come out of this councilman.

“Regardless– you have a child, and since you burnt down your home. You will be living with one of our residents, a trusted resident at that. You will be sepreat-” 

“No fucking way!”

“Abby, be reasonable here, the best we can do is to seperat-’

“That’s not fucking happening.” she crossed her arms, stood her ground, like they were going to blow her away with their words. Was she trying to look intimidating? If she was… it’s not working, from the way her foot is slightly shaking. Anyone could tell she stuffed all her nerves into that one area. 

“Chief please, I can’t babysit this grown woman..” You tried making an excuse, even if it was harsh, maybe that comment will set the reality that this rehabilitation at your abode is unnecessary. Maybe just maybe it will set in. 

“Yes you can, and you will. By the order of the council, you will be taking care of Abby Anderson, until she is confirmed healthy, and until we rebuild the house, which should take,. 4-6 months”

“Half a year, are you serious?!” You shouted, 

“We are working to expand this Village. However we need to clear the infected, and make sure we aren’t trespassing or any one else is trespassing. Lots of things need to be prepared before we just go willy-nilly on what to do. So yes, 4-6 months.. probably…. Okay. Meeting adjourned” 

The councilman was just about to slam their gavel on the block, until “ Wait!--”

“Lev and Abby, cannot be separated,” you stated, taking a step forward.

“They’re family, they came here together, they’ll be here together. I.. I have an entire lower basement where it can basically be a second home. There’s a room, a living room, a mini kitchen with no stove! And it’s plenty of room for Lev to not only have their own space, but no fire hazards near them.” You elaborated your argument, even pulled out as much information they could swim around in their minds IF it’s a good idea.

“You know the rules..”

“Screw the rules, this is a child we’re talking about!” You dared, taking another step forward, hands out to the crowd. 

“We don’t separate families in this village. We never have. And won’t start now.” 

The councilmen shared glances with each other, and took a final nod. “ Fine, prove to us that she can recover, and you’re able to take care of Lev.”

With two slams of their gavel, the meeting was finally over. 

-

On the way back to your house, the air was muggy, and hot, however opening your door was like a breeze of fresh cool air, yet at the same time it was thick, hard to slice through between you and Abby.

As she entered your abode, she was welcomed with bursts of your pheromones; your scent that gave a high for her nerves. All 500 nerves– in her nose, were all alerted that you’ve been in every inch of this house. Like a hungry hound dog, she wanted to keep inhaling you in until she f- She shook her head at the thought. Why would I think of doing.. –I never had this feeling  with– nor these thoughts..Oh god..

Pinching the bridge of her nose, swallowing those thoughts down with a heavy gulp. Regaining her focus once more, trying to keep it together is more like it. 

She saunters her way inside the house, following you, however it felt like she was walking through mud with how suddenly aware she was of herself and.. you..--- her eyes followed down the ivories of your spine, crossing steadily down to your hips.. Traveling further below to your arse.Those jeans on you look especially good today, the way they hugged you like a nice sized glove . She blinked twice, telling herself in her head to–

 Abs, get it together, the last thing you need in your life right now is to discover how perverted you could be. And to a friend? I should just crawl myself into a hole. 

“Sit.” you commanded, gesturing towards the kitchen. it was as if your personality switched. Abby’s eyebrows favored to be knit together for this click of a button you just pulled. For a while now, she noted you to be kind, and warm, but as soon as she was ordered to even be in your space, you’ve been acting.. abnormal. 

Abby sighed deeply as she obliged to your stern command, taking a seat at your kitchen's barstool. 

You took a long pause before speaking, and Abby took in your surprisingly expansive kitchen. It was a black themed rustic kitchen, you had a new range hood, You took a glass from your matte black cabinets shutting it so hard, that she winced from the noise. Oh yeah she’s suuuuper pissed.

 An island of a counter where she sat, and tapped her finger along the hardwood. It was as if your home was furnished like one of the old worlds catalogues that you almost could find in some places. Obviously not a lot of people were picking those up; more than likely you’d see more people scavenge for food or books. 

Speaking about books, Abby could have sworn she saw you have a bookshelf full of something… familiar but not quite.. normal for books that she would usually see. This whole situation was not normal. You apparently were not normal. In fact you were probably better in status for the village.. To which Abby had no knowledge of because the both of you don’t talk about this kind of stuff—– hell if she knew from the mountains and back you could be some kind of.. Whatever you were. It was weird, this is weird, you having all of this was weird.  As she stared behind you, as you curved your lip, thinking the best way to say.. With whatever you were pondering on, but forget that , you had had a fucking knife set, like a good one for cooking. ( She hoped). The kitchen was just… beyond the expectations Abby had before,  It was better than hers, before– burning it down, of course   

The longer you took to speak the more Abby became more in her head about: this house, this kitchen, your attitude…. Right..your attitude, this new too good for Abby to be in your space attitude?

Abby immediately gave fuel to her furnace of a mind.  Ah, she doesn’t want me to ruin her little set up she has. Wow.. I mean you burn one house and– well. Fuck I didn’t make them do this?

Tons of gasoline had just spilled all over the furnace. 

ARE they really that uppity that– I can’t even not be expected to damage their goods.. I mean.. It’s  not…. Tha—at great– oh who am I kidding I would have killed for this back when… well.. Yeah I probably would have.. 

And just like that a switch went off for Abby as well, that furnace was ready to explode, thinking she was being perceived in a bad light, and the thoughts that climbed on her as if she was the tiniest mountain, and laid putrid virus bringing fungus.  She felt disgusted with herself, with you, and this over the top house… 

She hated this, and you know what? Seeing how you’re taking so long to just fucking say shes a fuck up, is pissing her off even more so why doesn’t she just rip the bandaid off instead?

“You mad at me or something?”  She confronted, her face twisted with frustration, laced with abashment.

You popped your head back up to look straight at her, taking a step back. You could feel how angry she was steadily becoming.. You thought maybe she just–  needs some time to understand that some things are different for you at your house. On top of that… You actually were mad at her, you just didn’t know how to say it. Without.. Telling her too much. 

“Abby.. I- .. “  You balled your fist for only just a second, then wiping your hands on your pants, soothing yourself, before you popped your bubbles of words.

“I gotta take a shower. Please, –” A second mester of a pause, before sighing out a breath.

“Don’t touch anything, Kay?” your voice swaddled her brain, there you go, back to the person she knows, the person Abby grew fond of, but at this point, she barely knew you anyway. Why trust this is how you are now? When you’ll be different later, or the next second, who knows. 

“Hey, I didn’t ask for this shit either- -okay?” she grumbled, only to receive a petty response, you sucking your teeth as you walked away from her, retreating to your bathroom on quick feet.

 Great, I just can’t stop.. Messing up. I made her run away.. To the bathroom, now she’s gonna treat me even more differently, like I’m the psycho in her house, trespassing her shit! FUCK!

Meanwhile, you're in the bathroom clutching at your chest, sliding down the wooden door. Your heart raced so fast it mirrored a woodpecker, poking at your rib cage. 

Abby.. is in my fucking house, holy shit… holy fuck?! Why the fuck would they set me up like this?! I can’t have her in my house.. I already was trying my best to be normal around her. Now… she’s in my kitchen. Sitting on my barstool.. 

Damn did I even clean today?

You were too busy gay panicking in the 4 walls of a room to even think why you were mad in the first place. It was too much. You’ve slowly been building a friendship with her as stated before. Did you expect these feelings to expand, of course not. Abby was new, and different, and a little scary, but you liked that! Everyone in your Village was okay, but not okay. And Abby —definitely peeked your interest to more than JUST an okay. At first, it was bumpy, awkward; You would often see Abby take a few steps back away from you, or even the conversations would be surface level, and at that point– in your mind at the time you cleared out the blossoming friendship. You hate vague conversations, or more like people pleaser convo’s. Saying all the things that anyone else would say or like to hear; tip-toeing around invisible non-existent mines. All for you to just sigh then give out a soft “yeah, that is cool”. You were already used to that here in the village. It was dragged out and tired. You had enough, and confessed to her  “I cannot keep having these conversations with you anymore. I understand that you’re new, but.. Me personally. I cannot fathom myself speaking to another person who just wants clean responses.”

“Clean responses?” she parroted, a question that knitted her brows together

“Yes! Clean responses. I can’t see myself, being friends with someone who is too afraid to speak to me like a real person. I mean c’mon Abby, I only know your name. I don’t know you other than that..”

“Yeah, you know what..? This is bullshit.”

“I agree, so let’s just sto-”

“I used to be a part of the fireflies…”  and after that she would bread crumb information about her, and it was enough. You understood that Abby was truly different, an entire backstory she can’t even speak casually about. And you were willing to wait, as long as she just continue being herself.

-

You came back from upstairs, quick on your feet, the thumps going on in your house could only be your footsteps. When Abby swerved her attention towards you, her cheeks became appled, delicious red apples took form in her cheeks. You were in a tank top, your tits bounced with every step, and shorts, nicely fitted, and could make many take a large gulp as Abby just did, her eyes scattered around your physique, not knowing where to exactly land. Your nipples appeared bitten by the cold or.. Silken with arousal… Who knows. But, what Abby knows, is that you just got out of the shower. Your split ends sticking to parts of your face, the glow of your skin marveling in her eyes. Once again blinking twice to cut the entrancing spell of a hold you just had her under. Her heart raced, and her mind jumbled with thoughts on why she’s becoming flustered from just seeing you in your relaxed state. She has seen Mel, and many of past friends that came and went in the same attire. Why are you different?    

 A quick adventure to get, a piece of paper, and a pencil. You took notice of Abby’s curled hand, assuming she is still upset, even after taking a break between each other. Which prompts you to remember all over again why you were pissed at Abby in the first place.

 A groan milked out of your throat, pouring over to Abby, she took heed to your noise. Her shoulders tensed, and wrinkles molded on her forehead by her bushy brows.

You slam down a piece of paper and pencil.

“What is this?“  Abby wondered, darting her eyes straight to the piece of paper.

“Write a bucket list” 

“Huh?” 

“Write. A. Bucket. List” , your voice was molten with frustration, your voice also hinted rigged from the shake of your hands. Your eyes glossy from fighting back tears out of the heavy amounts of whiplashes of emotions you’ve been put through for the past week. 

“You know, you try to hide it even though I can see through all of this shit. You think you can just up and leave off of the face of the earth? Lev needs you, and I-” 

“--I don’t think you want to be in that kind of situation again..” you said, tugging on a loose string from your shorts, tending to it, like it’s something interesting. But in reality you can’t seem to look Abby directly in her eyes at the moment. 

She nods slowly with a soured lip, letting that comment marinate in her mind. Abby didn’t intend to take her life that day, nor did she even notice that her fate almost ended as swift as stepping on a cigarette. Her attention dragged from the piece of paper, to the counter, then finally to you. She could tell you were truly upset with her. Not because of the thought of her taking her life.. But, not caring about it to a point that she put herself in danger. The danger scared you, and it most definitely scared Abby, she doesn’t want to die. Maybe wallow in sadness with guilt, but dying? That’s her worst nightmare (literally). 

“Write a damn bucket list before you croak”  Abby ruminated on this proposal… it was the weirdest suggestion she’d ever seen but.. what is even normal nowadays? In actuality maybe this could help actually see her life is more precious and want to keep going without being lost on what to do next. It’ll keep her busy, keep her sane, she’d hope.

- 

You both decided to sit down and really speak about the issue at hand. Abby felt it was important to discuss these things with you. Regardless, it was heavy. She obviously didn’t tell you everything, but she did let you know: She’s going through a lot. She said her past was  very unsettling, hoping you can understand that these parts of her are..not too much for you. She was vague about some things, yet you understood. You understood that if she was not ready to talk, then she’s not ready. Her forcing herself wouldn’t be the right thing to do. And you forcing her would be down right throat ripping. So, you kept your head high, nodded and told her. 

“I’m ready whenever you are ready. And when you are, don’t hold back. I can take it.”

The way Abby’s eyes glinted in the light, you could tell she wanted to burst into tears right then and there. Those words, little as they are to some, but big as planets for her.  Yet, she held it in by biting her lip – 

hard.

Moments past as you both tried to get a feel for each other with conversations about the counsel meeting, and talking a little shit about how the jury wouldn’t stop gossiping  than judging a verdict. It felt freeing having to just treat each other as friends again, the fear of taking several steps back only faded away with each smile shared, and poke at how you got so serious to save her and Lev’d family. Though, even Abby can’t deny that, it was sweet on how you stepped in for them.

“Also… since your house has been.. Deleted–”

She scoffed through her nose  at that line,  shaking her head. “uh-huh”

“You should sleep in my bed from now on.”

As soon as you said that, her hypothetical tail wagged so hard, her eyes went round, her cheeks bloomed roses, and yours bloomed various flowers right back. “I- i WAIT! I meant um. I meant uhh- I m-meant y-you can sleep there.. By yourself! I mean yeah..” 

“Oh..” her words trail off, as her eyes shot down to the floor, like a nervous tick she rubbed the back of her neck, swiping off any lingering thought. She sounded as if disappointed. You may have caught it but swung that inkling of a maybe back to the trash. In denial that it was just something else. No way Abby would be thinking about cuddling you in bed right? … right?

“Actually– I’m okay with sleeping on the couch.” Her fingers intertwined with each other, not knowing what to do with her hands.

“Oh come on, Abby” You whined, rolling your eyes. Here she goes again trying not to be in the way, and you only trying to make sure your guest is comfortable. Besides, one day she’s going to have to switch with you, giving the 4-6 month repairs which is highly unlikely. The council is definitely going to just move her into another house, most likely the cleared space ones, after  the infected are carved out of those zones. Not only that but, your proposition to the council was genuine, you do have a lower space below your house for Lev, just lev.. For the rest of your house… It's mostly occupied. You didn’t think you’d ever have to invest in 2 guest bedrooms, 1 yes but 2? This is going to be interesting. 

“No– noo… You come on.”  Abby replied, with a playful push to your side, and you pushing right back, snickering out loud. 

“I’m in your.. Fancy ass house, because I fucked around and obviously found out. You already didn’t want to house me while.. Y'know, babysitting me until I’m good.. Up here” She points at her head. “I’m not going to take your bed too.. So— don’t even worry about it”

“Ab-” You tried to explain that’s not exactly what you meant, you wanted to tell her: The council could have taken you more seriously if I reminded them that you are a grown capable person, and it came out that way so they’d see that it’s not fair to you or to me, to be pushed together like this. 

“Nope. Mm-mm” she shook her head pointing a finger that hovered your warm supple lips “We’re not arguing over this. Take your bed, keep it, I’m taking the couch. ‘Kay?” Her voice was so stern.. And sooooo hot, god, how you wished she’d get in real close to your ears and talk to you like that all day. Voice so addicting you could swear that angels played the harp everytime she shared a word. 

“Ahem, Well okay. Fine. I will cease my.. Insistence about you sleeping in my bed.”

“Good” Her smirk, showed some teeth, and damn you were getting hotter by the second, and not from just the hot weather. “O-Okay, I’m gonna… yeah I’m gonna go to bed now. Covers, pillows, anything you need.. Is in the closet in the hallway, right around the corner straight down away from the kitchen”

“Got it. Sweet dreams” 

Fuck you wanted to melt like frosty the snowman. 

“Mhm!” your response was high pitched and you quickly scurried away, up to your room, which in fact didn’t help Abby. Your butt looked so good in those shorts, your ass quaked from how fast you walked away. She  shook her head again, blinking twice. Maybe I'm just hot.. It has been a very hot day today…

-

A bird tapped on your window, waking you up, with tired sleepy eyes you stretched within your bed already knowing who sent this. You squinted at the bird's leg from afar, a small rolled up piece of paper attached to it. You took a deep breath, and sighed, getting out of your comfy covers, sauntering towards your window to open it. Sadly there was no cool breeze that smacked you in the face for tonight, just a bunch of hot air blown into your eyes, nearly drying them out. You carefully tweeted to the bird to come closer to you, the bird listened to your call, pidgeting its way to you,”Such a good bird, come on.”  you cooed, until it stood in your hands. Taking the wrapped piece of papers showing a yellow circle, your eyes bulged at the color.  “Okay fly on home,” There was no time to alert back with your usual signature, only time to act immediately. Lots of mucking about around your house, stirring  Abby while sleeping, it was like 4AM, and a loud shut from the door startled Abby, but I guess this is just another thing she has to get used to.  You would never do this for anything else but that letter was plastered on your forehead, before caring about anyone's comfort.

Where were you going though at such a random time of the day? When will you be back? Did you think Abby just wouldn’t notice you leaving the house? Is everything okay? Or are you trying to be petty?

These questions infected her brain, over and over again.

I wonder what her room looks like..

This thought came out of nowhere, like a driveby just to directly shoot into her cerebrum. Her eyes lingered on the staircase,only cascaded by moonlight, hitting each step like it was calling her to make a choice. It was crazy, why would she even think this is something  she should explore, this ridiculous thought. However, this thought was like a song you couldn’t get out of your head no matter how many times you tried to divert from it. Abby's pink muscle gliding over her quivered bottom lip. It’s a stupid idea..  She couldn’t keep herself laid down on her back anymore, she needed to sit up. Laying down only gave her pins and needles with these stained thoughts.

Once I cross this line I can’t go back..

She slouched, forearms on her knees, still not removing her eyes off of your staircase, her mind replayed you walking upstairs before going to bed. Her breath became unsteady, the house was filled with your scent which made things even worse for her. She wishes she could hate your scent, but it’s got her wrapped around a golden finger. Her mind is full of you, her nose is familiar with you, every part of her is being attacked by you. And you weren’t even there.  Her foot tapped against your beige carpet, she interlocked her fingers, fiddling her thumbs together. 

Her jaw twitched, the more she ruminated on these thoughts. Just take a quick peek. No harm in just a quick one. No- no.. I should not invade her space, I've done enough of that.

What if she has secrets too..?

What IF she has secrets too.. ?

What if….?

The resolve was just as easy as a slice of iron with a plastic knife, In other news, Abby obviously picked being nosey over being respectful. She had to know if she was in danger of someone that was more than what she assumed. I mean that’s what she kept telling herself with each heavy step up those stairs that she kept having eye sex with. 

Sneaking off with light steps, upwards the stairs she went. Opening doors, upon doors, in search of your room, and boom. She finds it. “Let’s see who you really are…” she lets out to herself, as she slides a finger across your furniture, until it hits a dresser. “ People always hide stuff in there dressers, especially how Manny used t-” 

Tight lipped she became, sighing deeply through her nose before opening your drawers, digging deep within your clothes. First drawer, nothing but shirts, the next pants, then.. Granted how organized you were she’d expect “Yup panties… really.. Cute ones? Huh.. oh. Some lacey ones wow! Someone’s getting freaky.” 

She digs through it, feeling a paper like substance, she nods with a smile. “ found it.” 

She tried telling herself that if there is nothing to prove that you are dangerous then.. She just wanted something to tease you with, or proof that you weren’t as perfect as she thought. To prove you're not really someone that she can trust. She holds the thin piece objects in between her fingers, lifts it up with a tight hold, and… to her surprise.. a photo of you.. in 

Poses and lingerie and some nud- 

She stuffs them back into the drawer. Pink cheeks, and jaw dropped to hell. All she found out is that: “I need to mind my business sometimes…” She comments aloud to herself.Placing everything back with her good memory, cursed or a blessing ? She has no idea which one is the answer, as she slowly pushes your drawers back into their rightful places. Careening out of your room, and stalking down the stairs. But before laying back down on the couch to drift off to sleep once again.. Mostly too forget about what just transpired. Her eyes shifted to the paper and pencil you’ve left on the counter. Guilt mounted her face, for two reasons, and for those very reasons she had to remove it. 

-

Heavy footing came entering the door, it was you lumbering about, tired from the business you had to handle, more like demands that needed to be made. “Sorry about that, I know I woke you up.. “ you had started off but no response, now you know full and damn well you shut that door hard after coming to your senses, you expected her to react with worry or irritation but no response was not on your bingo card. 

“Abby?” you called out to her but was interrupted by a loud snore, your attention whipped to her, sleeping with her tummy out, hand pressed against it, hiding her belly button. Sleep on her face, looks good. You’ve never seen her relaxed before, and it’s– peaceful.  You noticed there's no blanket on her, so, you grab one, and lay it upon her. And as soon as you turn around, so does she, knowing  from the noise she made, shifting herself around to face her back towards you.  Ignorance befallen you, not knowing Abby.. hasn’t been able to relax in quite some time, not even guessing twice that she was awake the whole time. Her heart never ceased racing, not from hiding from you catching her awake. No.. The fact she can’t rid her thoughts of you in those poses, in that attire, the face you had.. One of desire. 

-

Birds chirped, dogs barked, and of course someone is mowing their lawn in the beaming hot sun. Abby stirred, and rolled her shoulder around, tightening the cover over her body. There was a groan that couldn’t bear to be stuck in her throat, growling out a moan. A line of yellowed light streaked over her face, she subconsciously rubbed her forehead, and eyes, as if she could remove it off of her. 

“Fine, fine, forget it— -I’m getting up.”  She mumbled to herself, toned hushed for only her to hear, grabbing an edge of the couch  to help her rise up. She sat there, on your couch, manspreading, slouched, head hung downwards. Abby did not feel like getting up at all. The last thing she felt like doing was roaming around in an unfamiliar setting, only getting 3 hours of sleep. Partly from her secret mission, seeing you in such a risque … set, and the other, trauma. Though she craves it, she cannot risk having another smoke session with herself after last time. Pretty sure, you’d get on her ass for doing it again, and in your home no less.

With no noise in the house currently, it is safe to assume that you’re sleeping peacefully in your snuggled up bedroom, from Abby’s recollection, you had these gray sheets, fluffy pillows, some regular knitted blankets, and some silk pillowcases. Not to mention  a double black door that she could only guess is your extra closet full of who knows what. She’s not going to try and find out again, well.. Not the way she would have.. At first. 

“I don’t even think I ever dressed up for Owen like tha– I gotta stop thinking about that shit.” 

Her ears perked up as soon as she heard a yawn, and there you were. Right across from her, hair a mess, a piece of your tank top strap fallen over your shoulder, tits.. very.. cleavagy.. Fuck, you were just sitting there as if you weren’t in company. She even spotted a mole on your right tit-

“Stop thinking about what?” you asked with a dragged out yawn, as Abby stared up at you, your nipple still protruding through that thin fabric,”Stop.. Stop thinking about  my— my joints. M-my blunts.” She creates a half truth and half lie on the spot. Your nose scrunched at the mention of her brown leafed escape. “Yea—h not gonna happen Abby. You are officially taking a break from that.”  

“You’re right, don’t want me burning down your house too right?”

“N-no? That’s not what I mea-” You staggered to hold on to any sentence that would come out, only rushed and clumsy, you stood up as if you could physically stop her mind from going to a place you don’t mean to create in her world.

“No I get it, I fucked up. So.. y’know, don’t worry about it”

“Abby…” you said softly, like she’ll runaway if you make any sudden movements, so instead you moved slow and precise, taking a seat on the armrest of the couch, crossing your leg over the other. Near her but not suffocating her. Okay, you might be trying to come off as gentle but for Abby… in here scattered mind of multiple projections about you, definitely mostly from those pictures that she had no business gawking at. To her, you might as well shoot her with multiple memories of how you are just dripping with natural charm. Seeing you like this, straight out of bed should not make someone yearn this bad. You were like Eve's apple, close to touch, but never to be, and if  you were allowed to taste or even hold it, it still would be a sin. Fucking hell give her a break, Abby’s face was getting so hot  that even the A.C in your house couldn’t convince you she wasn’t blushing over you. But nope,  you think she’s embarrassed about some stupid ass joint that started a fire in her home. Or even embarrassed for craving one again after the fact. 

“Mm.. What?” She asks, trying her best to take interest in the floor, fake stretching her arms to block her sight from you.

“Weed– can enhance your initial emotion.” 

“Excuse me but.. Huh?”  Her eyes ticked up back to your face, it was glowing, regardless of your dark circles under your eyes from whatever you were doing last night, it still couldn’t falter any beauty you had in your face. Distraction had to be your middle name.  Please.. If there is a god.. Help me focus on this conversation.

“When you smoke, people say, get in the right headspace before doing so. You–”

Okay.. that– ok God, has a funny way for answering that..  She gripped on her pants leg, giving you slow nods that she’s ready to hear for you to finish, but is she really ready?

“I wasn’t in the right headspace..” Abby finished the sentence before those words dribbled down your tongue. No– She’s not ready, not ready to hear it from you.

She takes a minute to process these pieces you gave her to put together.

“Get dressed, we’re gonna do something.”  You said with a clap of your hand a lazy grin, you don’t want Abby to think about that, but she has every right to know about what weed can do and can’t do. You don’t care if she does smoke, but not for the reason she’s puffing out though.

Abby quirked an eyebrow at the sudden task. What you have in mind could be the pick me up that Abby should need. It’s the very thing that helped you be able to maneuver around with the requirements of your skills, has asked of you.  Of course, if she chooses to back out of this, then so be it, there’s nothing you can do until you can spot something that she enjoys.  And maybe something you both can enjoy together, to remove all of this tension, unwanted tension that started in the first place. You wouldn’t have guessed that the ice would have to be broken once more, though it’s too late now. 

Abby was just about to turn her heel and move on, but before she got dressed, she stood up from the couch, walking back to you. “This is going to bother me if I don’t fix this now.” 

“Hm?”

She fixed the hanging strap of your tank top, back over to your shoulder, and only a bit of her finger tips grazed it, your brain permanently taking a note that her hands are calloused, rough, her momentarily touch  felt good for only a second before withering away. Your heart ached from how quick a single touch can leave you. You tell yourself just suppress it.. Push that feeling all the way down.

-

You both changed, walking outside with a brisk air from the summer's morning, nipping at your skin, the weather was truly weird in this area of the world, at one time its hot as hell itself, then cool the next. luckily you wore a pair of sweats, a long sleeved shirt, and a pair of some old yet good sneakers, while Abby wore something you whipped up together ( more like she insisted on wearing vs what you picked out)  A muscle tee, Shorts, with black leggings, she chose to keep wearing the same shoes she had on before, a good pair that hasn’t failed her since moving into the village.  She followed your lead toward another garage? House like place… Abby figured this was like an unused building for someone to move in  or, maybe a public building for the community. Apparently not.. This was another building that you owned. Abby couldn’t take it anymore, the festering question on why and how the hell did you even acquire a majority of these items, titles, and more?

“What the hell do you even do?” She let out, stepping in front of you cutting off your path towards the buildings, the crunch of pebbled rocks under her feet. There was clearly a pathway connected to your house to the next building. Doubt mounted your face, you took another step towards her expecting she’d move out the way. Abby didn’t move. She wouldn’t not until she gets some answers, and she better get them today.

“Now what is it?” you inquired, shrugging your shoulders, and a hand rest on your hip. Your keys jingled in your free hand.

“This.. life of yours, this comfort, the big house?! You know, how? Why, for what? Do you do hardcore missions or..?”

She was exaggerating her movements, gesturing back to the house, and to the glassed building, It was kind of funny. Seeing her move around like she was playing charades. When she mentioned the hardcore missions, it perked your eyebrows. That was fast of her to catch on. Maybe too fast… You pondered if she possibly went into your room and saw that  piece of paper, but according to you checking twice, it seemed like everything in there was never tampered.

“Ah–, “

“What gave it away?”

“Everything.” She replied with a hand on her hip.

“Well, I do not do hardcore missions… anymore. I’ll just cut right to the chase, and I can’t answer all of your questions right now but I will tell you this. I  can make poisons, and I put up a pretty good fight.”

“Poisons..” She parroted letting that statement simmer in her mind. You nodded, folding your arms as you went on to explain further.

“The problem is that I try to intertwine both skills together, and that gets me in trouble.”

Her brow twitched at the mention of you possibly being danger, Abby couldn’t even imagine you hurting a fly. Emotionally? Hell yes, but physically? Come on now.  “Trouble like how? You purposefully put yourself in danger or just happen to be in places at the wrong time?”

“Eh, no–” you answer with puckered lips, you place a hand on your chest, opening your mouth to speak again.

“Me being able to make and decipher poisons is reliable, and if people were to find out that I’m the village's master key— then I would be kidnapped… or killed for this knowledge.” And it’s not like no one can acquire this knowledge, but it's the fact that you would even try to dabble in something so dangerous. It’s too risky for a lot of people to try. So they don’t, and probably don’t want anyone walking around with such dangerous information, especially in today's world.

“Oh” Abby faced dropped just like the oh that slipped from her lips. “Oh indeed” you said with a nod, moving around her, continuing your walk towards the building. Abby, faced the back of your head, watching you unlock the door as you continued speaking.

“For my efforts, knowledge, and more I have been gifted many things as thanks for keeping the village safe as long as I have”

“How lon-”

“17” you interrupted, admitting you’ve been at this poison game since 17. That’s kinda rough finding out you had to grow so fast, it kind of reminds her of Lev. They’re so many things she wishes she could protect him from, to even have a bit of innocence within him. That’s exactly why she let him hang out with his friend.

“I’m 24 nearing 25 now”

“Oh, that's so young..” 

“You figured me older?”

“I… Yeah at least 29.. Not from the looks, but the amount of time it should have taken to make your house..Well– houses–”  They mirror grand, as if you took time and major effort just so it can look normal. There’s no physical evidence of worry or doubt that the house wouldn’t last, in fact the house appears to have a promise that it will continue standing.

“I mean you’re like a year older than me..”

“Mhm,” 

The conversation fell silent, as you both entered this gym, Abby was amazed that you had all of this to yourself. Then again.. Is she sure that this is only from being able to make poisons, and identify them. She knows this is a fucked up thought, however thinking back to those photos.. Were you doing more than you led on?

“What else you got in that pretty little head of yours?” Abby meant this as a tease but, when it came out, her ears were hot, and yours mimicked the fire. 

“Uh.. Pretty.. Thanks. Um.. wow.. Okay..”

“Where do you wanna start?” you asked, passing her a water bottle, Abby catching it with ease.

“All of it..” 

You both talked as you stretched together before exercising: about how long you’ve studied poisons, herbs, different things and such picked up along the journey it took to get to this village. Abby shares that she knows how to craft some things for infected, or even supplies in case of high risk emergencies. You take notice how her shoulders dropped talking about infected versus people, this is another skill that you have picked up along the way. Of course, in this day in age, you must understand body language, charisma, and a personal skill that you can gradually upgrade. Your eyes were gravitating to her scars on her arm,  you hadn’t noticed that there’s so many on her back, her shoulders, usually in the place of this situation you’d trace those scars. You would have been nursing her until her skin came back to its original form, even if it was only a bit. 

As you both prepared yourselves for more stretches, you found it a bit funny that some of the flexible stretches were hard for Abby, given her physique she should have no problem. That hinted for you to understand that your previous theory of her being more on the muscle mass side, to be more true as she struggled to put a leg over her head, but as with you, you’ve done it without much effort. Abby was amazed, and a little nauseous that you could bend in ways that she didn’t even know humans could. Until, you had  put both of your legs behind your head, you hadn’t notice but she could see you fully display yourself to her… Your pretty pussy formed perfectly under those sweats.. She took a big gulp that you mistaken for her to be quite shocked that you chose this position. 

“Cat got your tongue?” 

“ H-huh, uh.. You know lets, stop stretching and um, actually get started with whatever.. Yeah?”

Her cheeks were flushed, and her wording tripped and fell , You nodded in agreement. 

“You said you put up a good fight.. Prove it” Abby challenged, this was something she knew that would force her out of her thoughts, and if you both exercise with each other instead of individually, Abby wouldn’t struggle completing her reps with you in the same room. Getting out of your complex position, you stood up, stretching your limbs, cracking your arms. “Lets begin” you told her, and she gave you a quick nod.

Both of you circled each other, mirroring two hawks circling one another, sizing each other up. Anything that was friendly has left the door, your eyes became focused with each breath you took, as the same with Abby. For as long as you knew Abby was like this hermit that would only come out if Lev begged her, or she felt she needed to get some air from her old house, the assessment was easy for you to see how to make this match quick and easy. The hard part was a single question: is Abby easy to take down? 

You sent a playful smirk, try getting into her head maybe? 

Only to receive a click from her mouth, giving you a wink, so nope… getting into her head was definitely not ideal.. Not from the way your ears became inflamed with something fierce, and you can’t blame the heat outside for this. No.. she’ll find out everything if she’s going to be this close to you. 

As light as as you were on your feet,  Abby didn’t anticipate how fast you could be, let alone being able to get behind her blind spot, but of course Abby is sharp when it come to these things, being apart of the fireflies, and WLF, she’s had plenty of time to understand how to block this attack  yet-

You manage to lock your arm under her armpit, a strong grip? A strong grip indeed, you may not look it but you’ve done your own studying beyond poisons. You understand that you must over power her.. Use her weight against her, throw her off her game quick and fast.  A gasp leaves from Abby’s supple lips, not only from shock but the flash back with that girl, that scrawny girl that followed her all the way to the driest of places. Abby was going through currents of multiple waves back and forth of her mind as you proceeded, swiping your foot on the blue mat connecting the back of her leg, her balance no longer strong and still, launching her on her back. A  thud echoed, and silence soon followed.  A beat passed, and grumbles came from under you, A scowled face Abby was met with your eyes, colder than you're used to.. “Lucky”  she spat out like venom, under her breath, “Lucky or am I just that good?”  you replied leaning closer to her, smug face and all.

Abby forced a laugh out, pushing your face out of hers, but snatching it back  when she felt your lips on her fingers.. “ Just. Luck-key.” Abby was pissed. Her ass being handed to her so many times, her veins on her arms pulsed, as she gripped hard, nails digging into her skin, her fist ached to punch something. I want my control back. 

Not only did she want that but she is tired of you coming up in her thoughts so much, and that person, the reminder of her mistakes, all of it came back to her. It was too much for her to handle right now. It’s either she keeps fighting to regain her control or her downfall. She knew her body isn’t the same as it once was, she knew she used to be a full blown tank with how her assets of a body plowed through people bigger than you. This was just embarrassing, and losing a simple sparring with some girl she only met a few months ago, Absolutely not. Especially not the person who finds it embarrassing that they have to take care of a grown woman, is what Abby tells herself, only to get even more enraged.

“Again.” She ordered.

“Abby.. we’re just sparring no hard feelings..”

“Yeah sure whatever, Again”

You saw her as something else right then and there, determination, and sizzling rage. Maybe the adrenaline will help her? Or… will it only make her lose again. You didn’t wanna see how she’d react if she’d lose however, her little pout right now is just too adorable. And to be able to know that Abby, this lone wolf, is just a competitive pouty faced girl— kinda worth it.  “Alright, you asked for th-”

She rolled her neck cracking it, with a satisfying pop, that sent shivers down your back.”Just fucking, square up..” She snapped, her tone low and rumbled, you bit your lip at the shift in her voice. It was kinda scary.. Yet, you stood your ground, centering yourself, waiting for her to make the first move. Her chest rose and fell with every fired breath she took.

Round after round you kept mopping the floor with her, beads of sweat drenched the both of you. Of course, you didn’t actually want to go this far, but Abby could tell that you were going easy on her, which would lead her to being a little more hot headed, until you gave in and fully gave her your strength. For Abby, she was mind boggled that she kept losing, she had no idea how out of shape she’s become, and it irk the hell out of her.  It was hard for her to see you as you… You slowly turned into the images she long thought she had buried, yet they're all coming back up like guizers. That fucking brunette.. 

“Should have got rid of you… that day” She stated under her breath, it threw you off, you could barely hear her, but you could tell something was off about Abby. Something strange.  She beelined towards you faster, coming at you like a full force one manned army, throwing wild punches, punches that you found easy to catch now harder, uncontrolled, unpredictable. Blocking her was impossible. You had to stop this, wrapping around her lifting one of your legs to add some needed weight, falling with a loud bang to the floor. Her landing on top of you, was too fucking close for you to hide rapid heart beats. Both of you groaning from the impact, though Abby refuses to lose, she holds onto you like a damn rattlesnake, squeezing you hard within her arms and legs. With barely any strength left you put your all in into one swift move by picking her up slightly gaining your fierce return to be back on top. Rising up, putting more weight onto Abby,that she has no choice but to react instinctively to leg go of you-- for only a second to free yourself from her ached grip. Only her arms break from the hold, her legs still tight on you like a trapped iron cage.  She’s isolating you from getting any leverage from this round. The hell even happened before? Was she trying to tire you out? To wait to pull this move out on you? 

Fuck it at this point. Abby’s mumbling to herself, you’re exhausted, this fight has been long overdue to just end. You catch a moment of vulnerability, a flash in her eyes that said  ‘I want to stop’ and you knew from just arguing with her from earlier, the insistent ‘ i’m fines’ from the hospital.Your mind focused on that inkling of passage of who Abby really is, a person who doesn’t give up, and does not want people to worry about her, regardless if she's truly suffering. You had to make her stop. Knowing she smokes only gives you another advantage. You put all your strength into separating her legs from you, while pinning both of her hands above her head. Using your free arm to press into a muscle that can’t handle pressure against it, a groan escaped Abby’s lips, she tried to hang on regardless of how painful it was, so you pressed deeper. You didn’t want to do this, but something is not right, and it had to stop now. Her pained leg lost it’s grip and you acted fast as a animal in the savanna. Your eyes were so focus and zoned in on a quick maneuver. This wasn’t to win anymore. You place your knee on her stomach until she fully stops floundering around.  Tapping your leg 3 times, you remove yourself off of her, getting up and looking down at her. 

Her chest rising and falling. Face red and frustrated.  

“Next time creed, you just might get me.” 

You offer a hand but she smacks it away “I can at least help myself.” 

-

Abby swishes her hand in the tub, checking the temperature before getting in. Her muscles are sore, so sore that she’s amazed you have her aching like this. Usually a workout like that wouldn’t affect her like that. She turns on her heal to face the mirror, observing her physique. It’s been a while since she’s checked herself out, and boy… is she upset. Like yes she knows she looks somewhat good, but.. She grew accustomed to the body she had before. It was like a natural shield for her, a confident boost for not only around people, but around the infected. She’s done some kind of soul searching, understanding that she built that body out of rage, out of… obsession. But, now she’s pissed that she got her ass handed by you. And you’re nowhere near how her previous body was built, nor like those really built seraphites. You knocked her ass down, with strength and logic. She could tell you have a good eye for seeing through people, even through fighting. That’s dangerous. Really dangerous.. So dangerous that it has the corners of her mouth turned up.

You made her excited, and that is something she hasn’t felt in a while… In fact she wants to spar again, just to see if she can pick up a few things from you. Maybe even bulk up again, because if she gets her ass handed to you once more.. She just might pull her hair out. The competitive side of her eating at her like a steady starving hawk. Those memories though— she doesn’t want to think about it. She hated that she got so mixed up with what was real and what wasn’t.  Luckily it wasn’t too bad of an episode today.. She doesn’t even feel like screaming into the water like how she usually would. 

Whirling herself back around to face the tub, she takes a step in, warm and pinched slightly at her skin, then fully emerging herself in the waters, “Oh hell yes… Who cares if she’s bougie, this is nice..” Her voice echoing in the large bathroom. 

A knock at the door, signals her senses  “You forgot your towel..” you said in a meeked tone, “oh yeah? Hand it to me.” 

You slowly opened the door, as it creaked as loud as your heart was beating against your cage. Trying your best not to fully come in, trying– to hand her the towel, yet… it’s barely reaching her.

“Um.. You can come in, you know?” Abby reassured, and your cheeks got hotter by the second, but you sucked it up and pushed through, regardless of how anxious you were about Abby being able to hear how hard your heart rattled. Abby faced forward to another wall, not even tempting to stare at you, of course not after that spar session. Honestly, the more she got to know you the more her heart also began starting its own rapture; thunderous weather could have confused anyone if they laid their head on Abby’s chest.  You dragged your feet over to her, trying your best to still not look, covering your eyes with your hand, however you heard a snicker. “Are you that scared of seeing me naked?” she asks,with a chuckle.

“Scared? No- no?”

“ You’re totally scared! Look at how nervous your hand is, it’s quaking”

“Shut u—p” you stretched out with a groan, laced with a high pitched whine. “Well you’re going to have to open those peepers,  I still can’t grab the towel without exposing myself”

“F-fine!” You slowly moved your hand out the way, and there it was.. Her back, even though she hasn’t gotten her full strength back, her back was toned, and scared. Old scars, you wanted to trace them just like before in your gym, gliding your touch ever so carefully, and ask her what stories do those scars hold. “Here..” 

“Thanks! Now get out you perv”

“I!? WHA? YOU! You told me that I could come-”

“I’m just fucking with out haha!” 

“

“Look at you ‘splode with sooo much passion. So embarrassed, so flustered, ha!” 

“You’re an ass hole.. “

“Yeah, and you handed me mine earlier, gotta get my lick back somehow” 

You rolled your eyes, softly laughing to yourself with her childish play thrown at you like a curve ball. You’d walk out, shutting the door behind you, pressing your back against the wooden door. “We’re gonna go grocery shopping after you’re done.”

“Alright, Give me a second” she said and you could hear the water splashing, moving with her. All you could do was imagine her bare back again, the droplets that designed it so meticulously, and not taking the shine away from her cute freckles. You’d pinch your thigh to regain some kind of composure. 

“N-no t-take your time” 

You tell her squeaked voice, as you shakily hold up a piece of paper that Abby wrote for you. Now this piece of paper was supposed to only be about her taking life into her own hands and controlling what she can. It is, but then again there’s this section she wrote for you: ‘Lev is not coming back until Sunday morning, I will explain to them what happened, do not interfere. If Lev and I will be a part of this household with you, then there’s something I need you to do… Keep an eye on him. He thinks this Village will allow him to just be able to go off on missions, sometimes he’s snuck off out of the Village to do his own thing. I could never catch him on my own. And I don’t know exactly where or what he does with his “personal” missions. Promise me by wrapping your pinky around mine, when you finish reading this.. And also,  Thanks, for.. Not ratting me out to the Council.’ If you thought Abby was going to be a handful, well you got another thing coming…. You took a deep sigh, pinching the wrinkle in between your brows. “And now,, I have an emotional, hormone raging, and I can do it myself, teen..  In my house. Great.” you let out under your breath like a secret only for you to hear. Until suddenly a creak from the door opens, and you fall right into Abby while she’s only in her towel.

Prologue||continue?->

Tags: @saturnhas82moons (let me know if you want to be tagged for the next chapter dear readers ❣️)

A/n: Hello! I hope you enjoyed the story! 💋

[oneheadtoanother]

"Stop an American and begin to make some serious criticisms of our society, and nine times out of ten his final defense will be: 'But this is the freest and finest country in the world.' When you probe into what he means by this, it turns out that what he is really talking about is the material goods that he can acquire in exchange for his birthright of political freedom. That is, he is free to have an automobile, a TV, a hi-fi, and all kinds of food, clothing, and drink as long as he doesn't offend anybody he works for or anybody in an official capacity, and as long as he doesn't challenge the accepted pattern of racial, economic, and political relations inside the country or its foreign policy outside. On these questions most Americans absolve themselves from any responsibility by saying that all that is 'politics' and 'I am not interested in politics.' What they really mean is that they are afraid to assume political responsibility because it would mean jeopardizing their economic and social status. No people in the world have more to say about the lack of free speech in Russia, China, Cuba, and Ghana. The reason is that as long as they have these other places to talk about, they can evade facing the silent police state that has grown up inside America. If you casually mention the police state to an American, the first thing that comes to his mind is some other country. He doesn't see his own police state.

That is because in the United States, more than in any other country in the world, every man is a policeman over himself, a prisoner of his own fears. He is afraid to think because he is afraid of what his neighbors might think of what he thinks if they found out what he was thinking, or what his boss might think, or what the police might think, or the FBI, or the CIA. And all because he thinks he has a lot to lose. He thinks he has to choose between material goods and political freedom. And when the two are counterposed, Americans today will choose material goods. Believing they have much to lose, Americans find excuses where there are no excuses, evade issues before the issues arise, shun situations and conversations which could lead to conflict, leave politics and political decisions to the politicians. They will not regain their membership in the human race until they recognize that their greatest need is no longer to make material goods but to make politics."

-James Boggs, The American Revolution: Pages from a Negro Worker's Notebook, 1963. (emphasis added by me)

[undying-love]

Has Paul ever implied that Let Me Roll It was made with John in mind?

He was initially more hesitant to admit it:

"I still don’t think it sounds like him [John], but that’s your opinion. I can dig it if it sounds that way to you." (1976)

"I didn't intend the song to be a pastiche of Lennon. [...] The vocal does sound like John. I hadn't realised I'd sung it like John." (1999)

"Let Me Roll It" was a riff, originally, a great riff to play, and whenever we played it live, it goes down great. We’d play it on two guitars, and people saw it later as a kind of John pastiche, as Lennon-ish, Lennon-esque. Which I don’t mind. That could have been a Beatles song. Me and John would have sung that good."

"Let Me Roll It’ wasn’t to John. It was just in the style that we did with The Beatles that John was particularly known for. It was really actually the use of the echo. It was one of those: ‘You’re not going to use echo just cos John used it?’ I don’t think so. To tell you the truth, that was more rolling a joint. That was the double meaning there: ‘Let me roll it to you.’ That was more at the back of mind than anything else. " (2010)

"‘Let Me Roll It’ was not really a Lennon pastiche, although my use of tape echo did sound more like John than me. But tape echo was not John’s exclusive territory! And you have to remember that, despite the myth, there was a lot of commonality between us in the way that we thought and the way that we worked." (2020)

But in his book The Lyrics, he finally said:

"John loved this tape echo and used it more than any of us, so it became a signature sound on his solo records. I’m acknowledging that by using it here. I remember first singing ‘Let Me Roll It’ and thinking, ‘Yeah, this is very like a John song.’ It’s in John’s area of vocalisation, needless to say, but the most Lennon-esque thing is the echo." (2021)

Then he adds:

"When we do talk about the lyrics, I think it’s fair to say that to ‘roll it’ has to do with rolling a joint. I don’t think that’s going to come as a surprise to anyone. When I play live now, I sometimes wonder whether the audience isn’t a bit prudish. Then I smell marijuana and I think, ‘Well, that’s alright. That smells good.’ That probably happens more at festivals, though. It’s probably easier not to get caught by security. ‘Let Me Roll It’ is a love song at its heart. The other, erotic, sense of rolling that is part and parcel of rock and roll is very much part of it. The image of ‘My heart is like a wheel’ so ‘Let me roll it to you’ is one that anyone can connect with. Anyone can understand how exposed you feel when you offer your heart to, or reveal your affections for, another person. It’s very difficult. The hesitation we feel in that situation – of wanting to reach out but being reluctant to be completely open – is made physical in the abrupt starting and stopping of the riff."

[amebanworld]

THIS!!

Actually this is something the fandom has been wondering about for 40 years straight (at least the ones that love this psycho war birdy).

Now, let me add my two cents to this analysis.

I also noticed the resemblances between RC and pre-war Skybound Starscream. They seem to be quite alike in the terms of his good nature with some flaws. Also, the fact is G1 cartoon Star is the only Dcon who was portrayed in a good way in a flashback. At this point, we all have to agree that pre-war Starscream was certainly a nice and good person. And this is the main reason b/c G1 Star is a beloved character.

It’s true that Starscream is different in every media, but I also find this version of him is quite similar to Shattered Glass and Armada’s versions of him, unlike IDW, who was a more grey morale guy before the war. This is important because Armada and SG are both involved in the war actively, but their morals still being very high; sure, Armada always had been a soldier and probably he didn’t live before the war, and SG glass is basically the opposite version of everything.

But they both remained the same nice persons, in spite of the war molded them.

So, why didn't this happen in the G1 cartoon and Skybound?

As you pointed out, in SB, he suffered a very traumatic experience and Meggs found him in a very vulnerable situation. In spite of the fact that you cannot portray a full background in a couple of pages (let’s be honest: Skybound’s narrative is quite random).. the problem is neither G1 cartoon nor RC novel truly show up the real reason behind. They just give some clues here and there about what could happen to him.

I agree about Skyfire’s and Starscream's friendship before the war. The shuttle hardly could have accepted him as a friend; he has a very clear idea about his morals and basically he has no reasons to join the Dcons once he learned how they’re. But don’t forget this: in G1 is established that Dcons were, by default, military war-framed Cybertronians (quite much alike war ants in an anthill)... and Starscream also claims to be cockly he’s “the proud of the Cybertronian war academy”. So: wasn’t he a scientist of the Cybertronian version of National Geographic?

This means, at some point, he joined the academy, as it should be due the war-frame function. But: when??

At first, I thought he did after he came back to Cybertron and learned a war was happening. For some unknown reason (THE reason) he decided to join it and become a warrior with quite good results, embracing his war nature. However, the fandom has developed the idea in a different way: he was in the military academy in the early stages of his life, because he’s a seeker and that’s what seekers do. But eventually he decided to become a scientist, dismissing his initial function.

And that’s when RC came across again. This story pisses me because the plot has the potential to be really a thing… but the conflict attached to the plot is really biased!  The G1 cartoon was quite flat in many ways, so it just ignored many important things…. But this novel just IGNORES the elephant in the room. Optimus just realizes Dcons are like that because of personal experiences?? Seriously??

At least the cartoon added the “Brain smash machine” as a reason to make Cybertronans evil, just like happened with the Constructicons and their friendship with Omega Supreme. It’s stupid, yes, but at least there is one reason!

I guess this is the main reason because the fandom thinks Nominist and Functionalism reasons that appear in IDW and Aligned continuities are very valid reasons to make Dcons-.. to be Dcons. They’re a revolutionary faction against the establishment, which eventually become out of control. We know G1 is not IDW nor Aligned, but at least this makes sense and those reasons could be applied to Starscream.

On the other hand, Skybound has its own canon. We don’t know what caused the war, but at least, we have a general idea about what happened to our favorite seeker boy.

Day something of crying over how similar pre war Skybound Starscream/Ulchtar and amnesiac g1 Redemption center Starscream are, literally my first time reading issue 13 I was reminded of RC. Starscream without his memories and essentially a blank state was just exactly how Ulchtar used to be before Genvo's death and meeting Megatron.

His natural state was so polite,reasonable,intelligent and curious, these traits got morphed into more twisted versions once the war started. I always did wonder why was someone like Jetfire close friends with Starscream in g1? because Jetfire couldn't tolerate a few hours with the decepticons noticing how they were, and if we take RC being a g1 adjacent story(since I believe they do mention events of some episodes in season one I think)it makes sense because Starscream was also a pretty nice/decent person back then.

As I recall redemption center had a whole conversation with the Autobots trying to figure out if there was a way they could influence and reason with decepticons- with some even suggesting brainwashing which Optimus was against- but it was mostly about trying to understand whether they were inherently bad people or was it circumstances that shaped them into who they are today- eventually realizing it was the latter for the most part, by the end Optimus narrowed down that without whatever happened in his past Starscream would have been a different person but it was the past that influenced and changed his personality to the one he currently has, that's why upon remembering despite a part of himself wanting to look at a possible bright future a few moments ago he felt he had no choice but to continue his old ambitions because he at his current state will never able to able to go back to who he used to be. That person is dead,and I think Starscream himself does miss his past self too he seemed partially disappointed that he remembered when Optimus realizes this.

This line especially stood out.

"he knew who he was,knew the inevitability of who he was"

I wonder everyday what would have happened had it been Optimus who met him first instead of Megatron. I wonder what was G1 Starscream's inciting incident like Skybound with the death of his friend. What happened to him after that expedition where he lost Jetfire and before he met the decepticons?

Like not trying to excuse anything,he was always pretty full of himself to an extent,in the he wanted to be validated kind of way but he still had morals and it wasn't borderline narcissism back then.

I wish he just went with Jetfire instead of staying. Not that it would've helped much but maybe then he wouldn't been corrupted due to war in the specific way he did. At the end of the day his actions are still his own and he did hurt so many people but I do still feel bad for him. My war criminal pookie.

Now I'm just wondering it really does add up to his relationship with Jetfire/Skyfire because after Fire in the Sky they literally act like strangers, for Jetfire it makes sense because the guy shot him for dead, but Starscream was acting strange even before that to the point even Megatron pointed it out. Thinking about it it really does make sense why, when he chose to shoot Jetfire it wasn't just a simple act of ending an old friendship, it was him severing the last connection he had to his past self, he chose to discard that part of himself completely that the friend he once spent so long mourning and even searched half the globe for,he had no hesitation shooting that same person down.

It's even more evident when Jetfire asks him if he's happier being a warrior than a scientist, to him of course it is, why would he want to go back to who he used to be? Starscream likely associates his past self with weakness in Skybound's case weakness that allowed Genvo to be killed,weakness of hesitating to kill prisoners for the cause that's why he doesn't like being reminded of his past. And it explains why he's kind of a control freak in a way he hates it when things are out of his control,he hates it when people try to control him so he follows the mentality he'd be even worse than them. Because this world is for the strong, something he told Thundercracker. If you were weak you die or lose what you care about.

And the fact he isn't initially drawn by Megatron when he and Soundwave come to get him back in RC while being in Optimus' care says a lot, a lot of things relied completely on circumstance Skybound Starscream was in a very vulnerable moment when he first met Megatron he just lost one of his best friends,lost his work station and saw Optimus himself shoot Genvo down in the crossfire, then in came Megatron. The panelling of that moment really does give the feeling to Starscream Megatron was like a saviour he was the one who gave him a new purpose in life,who saved him but in reality played the biggest part in his damnation.

The thing is I geniunely do not believe who Ulchtar was would have become the person Starscream is today without Megatron's influence, if he never met the latter and had been left to his own devices he would have continued to suffer for sure and have been a victim of war like Jetfire eventually became in the future, he would've either remained depressed and get more cynical or have died as a civilian later down the line,who he is today is a result of Megatron grooming him into being that way. He didn't show any real signs of wanting revenge at all, and seemed at a loss, until the latter tempted him and even then he was still willing to hold onto his morals up until he was forced to kill those POW against his will.

Megatron himself is a complex charecter and I can see why he also turned out the way he did because of that same cycle of violence but he did play a role in exacting that same pain onto others,same way Starscream in the present is hurting so many people who did not deserve it either. Again, the purpose of this post is not to say he was completely innocent, he is still accountable for his own crimes I'm not denying the fact, that regardless of what circumstances drew him to this point he did still hurt other people too.

There are so many gaps in the timeline of G1 SS's backstory I really want to know what the heck happened? This is only clue when he was remembering everything the minute he did he just couldn't stay even if he understood himself that going back was just ruining whatever bridges he could have formed.

Fun fact : Ironically he remembered his backstory upon falling/thrown off a cliff by Soundwave and being in a shock like state,much like RC losing his memory upon falling off a cliff and hitting his head lol. Soundwave also found it so funny he was looping the same footage over and over like a TikTok reel all the while enjoying seeing Megatron crash out over Optimus and Starscream and having the best time of his life and slightly manipulating Megatron into making efficient decisions. My Boy was winning for once. I feel like they did take some inspiration from RC.

[fullset-o-lovers]

who wants to hear about derek aubergine and amanda wilson being twins. who wants to hear about “why does your boyfriend look like my girlfriend” “why does your girlfriend look like my boss”. who wants to hear about clarissa suzanne and the wilsons moving to the uk after her mom’s death.

and who wants to hear how that fits into the O’Hands Everything Store :>

~~~

btw Derek is seventeen minutes older than Amanda. that’s very important (to him)

derek is older. derek is very importantly older than amanda. he’s older and it matters

amanda is taller though, and derek hates it

derek moved to the uk for uni

he calls his family weekly. they have pizza over video call

derek loves him family very much. after his mom left, the three of them (derek, amanda, and mr. wilson) got really close

amanda calls derek “little brother”

he hates it

ITS ONLY AND INCH, AMANDA, SHUT UP

obv mr. wilson misses his son, but he’s glad to see him thriving in devon

mr. wilson tries to meddle in derek’s love life

mr. wilson calls titch derek’s boyfriend

amanda finally meets titch on vc. cue “why does your boyfriend look like my girlfriend?” “why does your girlfriend look like my boss”

titch ignores it

james and amanda are besties fr once she moves

james (knocks to come into the outside) scares amanda

“why tf is mark here”

“uhhh hi? i’m james?”

once amanda gets over the initial shock, they’re besties tho

james sucks at names, amanda sucks at faces. gossip between them is harder to follow than a gaggle of geese

first, derek moves to devon (the town this all takes place), then the events of diwedding take place (but mark and clarissa break up before the marriage) explaining derek’s absence during the play. after the death of mrs. jenkins, clarissa decides she needs a fresh start, so amanda and clarissa move to devon together. amanda and derek persuade their dad, mr wilson to move with them.

Clarissa being like "hey guys I'm back! I went to that little shop in town, and it's just the best! [Insert Clarissa gushing about how the store is super cool and how they have everything you could ever want there and how the owners are super nice and friendly]" and Derek looks at her with EXTREME CONCERN and tentatively asks what store she's referring to. Because as much as he knows that it has the be the OES, her description is WOEFULLY CONCERNING relative to his (and everyone else's) experiences. Hes just kinda there thinking to himself "we can't possible be talking about the same place..."

clarissa was just enjoying the moment and not worrying about the *extremely worrying* goings on. And Derek is there like "girl, 'friendly and welcoming' are not the first words that come to my mind to describe those people..."

derek: did you meet their sons?

clarissa: i did! they were sweethearts

[narrator voice] clarissa did not realize the o’hands brothers were also lovers

(Clarissa loves the store itself as well because it's the perfect place to shop for her favorite hobby. You can find supplies for any DIY project there, no matter how weird or niche). and the prices are *much* better than hobby stores so her adhd ass can pick up any hobby she likes without breaking the bank. mama and papa o’hands just adore her

Derek is deeply worried by how she does not seem the least bit weirded out by the whole situation. Amanda, having heard equally weird but wildly conflicting accounts of the place from Clarissa and Derek, decides she doesn't even want to know lol

clarissa comes back from her weekly trip and talks to derek about it and amanda just leaves the room.

Amanda, walking out of the room as Derek and Clarissa discuss the O'Hands: "nope, I dont even wanna know".

amanda: [kissing clarissa on the cheek and grabbing her keys] i’m gonna go help dad at the restaurant

derek: ITS CLOSED ON TUESDAYS, YOU LIAR

amanda doesn’t wanna make Clarissa feel bad about talking about her experience. But she cannot mentally handle hearing about the o’hands 

[doitforstamets]

What’s up with the green lighting in the toast scene?

About me: I have a degree in fine art. Cinema is not my expertise even though I consider myself quite overall popculture savvy. I am a fucking nerd (this answer is several pages long).

Q: Has anyone figured out what’s up with the Green lighting thing? In Hob’s scene the computer was generating this very strong green color that hued the entire scene. The same thing happened with Ishtar in her changing room when talking to Dream.

There's a very in-your-face green light in the toast scene with Hob and Dream. Here are my thoughts about its meaning.

First, the obvious reasons: we associate (early) computers with green lettering. It also creates a great contrast with the yellow tones from the fireplace.

Symbolically, green could be so many things. Too many to make any sense. We have to look at it in the context of The Sandman – I’m choosing to do mostly season 2, because there’s been significant changes in between seasons, and I see them as visually self-contained.

One example I do wanna highlight (as cinema is continuously repeating certain motifs):

In The Matrix, blue is used to signify scenes happening in the real world, and a green hue is used for the ones in the Matrix. This is a widely known and duplicated effect in cinema to distinguish between different realities or experiences. Also the green “futuristic” bits of code, very Matrix.

Now, to The Sandman. 

Here’s the scene we’re looking at. Two things to note: the colours – green and yellow, stark contrasts – and the camera angle. Before this scene, the camera has stayed mostly level throughout the episode.

The previous scene, where Dream visits Daniel, also uses tilted angles for emphasis. The Dutch angle is a usual practice in cinema to convey instability or uncomfortable tension.

In this scene, the colour is blue, which is a straightforward choice for a bedroom at night setting. The camera angles change in between shots depending on the character whose perspective is shown. Lyta sees Dream as a threat. Dutch angle is used, in addition to stark backlight, to signify her discomfort in the situation. The scenes showing Lyta from Dream’s perspective are level.

As I see it, in Hob’s case, the angle is used to signify the state of dreaming – even more so Hob’s awareness of his state of dreaming. It is only used after he gets confirmation that it is, indeed, a dream.

There is also a lot of unspoken tension in the scene. Dream knows he might not be back for a while, but it’s left unclear how worried he actually is. Hob doesn't begin to understand the severity of the situation, partly because he's dreaming, yet he makes an almost prophetic toast.

(Personally I thought the use of Dutch angle was a little bit excessive here. We get it, it’s a dream.)

Another scene, where Dream and Ishtar are talking, was mentioned, so we’ll take a look at that. It'll help us define the meaning of these colours within the context of The Sandman.

Very green. More than Hob’s scene, although the hue is similar.

In this scene, Ishtar comes to the realization she’s most likely going to die. 

One fairly common interpretation for the colour green is death. (As well as jealousy – maybe some of that here – and disease, but that does not apply to the Sandman, so we are ignoring it.)

So does green signify death? Sometimes, yes. In the case of Sandman?

I don’t think so, here’s why: there are many scenes about death where green is not the primary colour. Bernie Capax is a character that we know very little about. Pretty much his whole point is that he finally dies. However, the scene is a blue-ish teal colour, not green. Ishtar also reverts to this colour scheme for her final dance.

In Ishtar’s case, I think the green is used to show her acceptance of death. As commonly seen in cinema, red symbolizes wraith, fury, violence. A green death seems more peaceful. 

Another character shown in green and accepting their death – even if posthumously – is Wanda. She spends her whole appearance in the show wearing deep green. (Also because of Oz. Another reference point I'm sure would make for a whole another essay.)

Going back to Hob, we cannot ignore his background. I’m going down a fucking rabbithole reading about medieval interpretations of the colour.

Green can be associated with nature, rebirth, transformation, the supernatural, the fae, magic and tricksters.

From my very limited research (please correct if I’m wrong) green symbolizes some form of afterlife or rebirth in ancient Egyptian beliefs, alchemy and Christianity.

Medieval scholars inherited the idea from ancient times that green was a Middle Colour. Symbolically, it balanced between the extremes of white and black. 

This next one will seem far-fetched. It might be. But I think this fandom will appreciate it nonetheless.

There is an Arthurian legend of the Green Knight: A strange visitor arrives at King Arthur’s court. He challenges the group’s leader or any other brave representative to a game and to meet him again a year later. The Green Knight is beheaded but does not die. Epic tale ensues.

There are so many interpretations of this story I can’t begin to analyze them without attending university first. There’s a lot out there if you’re interested.

I’m going to quote this part from an article I really liked (Being Green in Late Medieval English Literature):

“Sir Gawain and the Green Knight -- seems to rejoice in diversity and more fluid, adaptive human/nonhuman relations. For both authors (Gawain Poet, Chaucer) green, whether associated with a place or a person, indicates a moment of choice, or of change; a point where things are not fixed and sure, but liable to alteration. Moreover, it indicates that whatever choice we make, there will be consequences by which we must abide. We might like to consider our options carefully.”

In conclusion:

I don’t think green as a colour is either positive or negative, but sits in the middle, paradoxically a color of both the natural and unnatural, life and death, honesty and deception. 

Honestly, when I began, I was mostly thinking about the coming death as an explanation for this choice. Now it’s clear it’s much more complex than that. Not that I think this is the “correct” answer. I believe art, including all media, is shaped by the relation to the viewer and the viewer’s interpretation of things, whether it was intended by the creator(s) or not.

When it comes to the toast scene, the use of colour green can be summarised to the most relevant meanings:

Otherwordly. The atmosphere of a dream is created by camera angles and colours. There’s a contrast to other scenes that signifies the state of dreaming as well as Dream as a nonhuman entity.

The coming of death. Death is inevitably coming, as she says later in the series, she is the future. Dream’s decision to go to hell does, even if not in the way he assumed, begin a series of events that leads to death and grief.

As for Hob, I think it emphasizes his role as the everyman – Dream’s window to humanity, a familiar vessel to the viewer to insert themselves in. 

Most significantly: change. It would be insane to ignore this meaning of the colour, given the broader themes of the whole series. Change or die. In nature death and change are inseparable and part of the other. Take that as you will.

Thank you. I feel kinda insane.

Sources: https://slowburnhorror.com/2021/11/22/the-meaning-of-green-in-horror/ https://academic.oup.com/edited-volume/28372/chapter-abstract/215252927?redirectedFrom=fulltext https://www.medievalists.net/2024/06/colour-middle-ages/

[factual-fantasy]

30 Asks! Thank you!! :)) 🪥

Realistically? I cant think of a good reason why Jax would jump in fear at the sight of corn. Like it was going to bite him or something. Gooseworx said its because it reminds him of the farm but later said she may have lied.

Personally I think he was given a fear of corn just because it would be funny. 😅

As for my AU, he wont jump in fear of corn like he does in canon. But I'm thinking when he was a kid he ate a bunch of corn and then got really sick. Or maybe he choked on corn really bad one time. After that he cant stand the smell or taste of it because it makes him so queasy and uncomfortable.

He likely hasn't told anyone about it out of embarrassment. But he could have told Caine that he really hates corn and to keep it away from him AND keep it a secret. Which Caine would oblige without much question.

XD Thank you!

I can hardly remember them 😔💔 I think I remember them being cool tho.

I can kind'a see it in the boots and hat! :0 Though I cant see him throwing himself at giant monsters without flinching <XD

So far its been fun! :)

Thank you, 😭🫶I was prepping to be raked over the coals for speaking poorly of Jax.💔

@starloveshamburgers

I'm not sure how to make one really <:( a sona can look wildly different from person to person..

Also, I have no intentions to watch Rescue Bots for several reasons.. But mostly its because its supposed to be attached to Prime. Which is a bad thing because it breaks established prime lore pretty badly and that would really bother me throughout the whole show 😔💔

What is going on in this show man 💀

@linkinaboxx

Thank you! I have the spectator mode in my back pocket if things get overwhelming <XDD

Looking the song up, that is the most living looking zombie I have ever seen XDD But can see your point!

Noted :0📝 Thank you!

Thank you! :DD Same to you if you're participating! :))

Thank you so much! :D So far so good!

Yeah, it would be really sad if he did :( Thankfully in my AU he will not :)

@crossover-enthusiast

XDD No worries! Thank you!! :))

As for Bonny, I had this idea that no one in the circus really knows how to deal with her. She's only 8 years old.. how can they possibly make her understand the gravity of the situation she's in? Would they want her to understand?

For now, Caine takes care of her as best he can. Dr.Football and Bubble follow her everywhere, and tend to her every need. I considered Caine making an entire fake town for Bonny to live in but I don't know if Kinger and Queenie would tell him that's a bad idea or not.. Beyond that I haven't brainstormed a whole lot :(

@pundertalefan (Referencing this post)

AWWJFNDFDFN THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! :DDD

(Link in ask)

I've had that video in my watch list for ages. This ask finally gave me the push to sit down and watch it. Very heart breaking 😢💔

I thought it was cool! I was surprised to see such a style change XD

@theglassflower

AAAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DD💞💞💞

Also, Starscream actually has that cheek scar in canon! :0 He got it from battling Arcee one time.

In my AU he could have still gotten it fighting Arcee, even though he didn't kill Cliff. Also I just exaggerated the scar and made it go all the way down his face so it would look cooler 😎

I'm thinking in my AU, Caine wouldn't want to upset or stress out the humans with that kind of adventure. But if Jax and the others were getting bored and specifically requested that adventure, Caine would make it.

It would be a little tamed down and would not include the tiny swarm of souls in hell.

As for me? I've been hangin on. My condition has been kicking my butt these past few days but Art Fight has been a nice distraction.👍 Thank you for checking in 🫶

:((((( frfr

@minnesotamedic186

I'm as ready as I'll ever be! :D

Oh yeah absolutely, the circus is a nicer place but their real world is still as cruel as ever.

I don't like him as a bot just because I don't like the entire game of SOTM because of how it changes the FNAF timeline.

HOWEVER.. I like him enough as a character that I've added him to my silly sister location AU. 👍

I honestly have no idea what happened to their bodies. I'm curious about which path Gooseworx chose 👀

@fandomgurl1987

XD Thank you!! :))

Yeah I thought he was really funny for only having two half lines. XDD

@nolitogfoling

Hello! :D

@beryl-shade

They sure can! :)

[narutothoughts]

I stay thinking about this specifically SO

Naruto only notices because he watches kakashi so much. Imagine if the other Naruto doesn’t notice the change at all.

Maybe kakashi goes through a short phase in the new world where he doesn’t see Naruto at all because this version doesn’t seek him out as frequently and he couldn’t help but stay away. By the time kakashi does see him again, Naruto and Hinata have started dating and are so visibly in love he can barely believe Naruto once liked him at all. At first he thought hinata might have been a rebound of sorts, but there’s not a hint of attraction or interest in Naruto’s gaze when he looks at kakashi now. Not even a hint. He’s so relieved he tries not to question it even as a little voice in the back of his head needles at him about Naruto never being so fickle with his feelings. Going from overflowing love he couldn’t keep hidden when actively trying to nothing at all within a few weeks? No….its not right. But he ignores it. Ignores it then when he sees them hold hands and ignores it at the wedding and ignores it when they have kids. It’s fine.

Or maybe kakashi, man of his memories that he is, only develops feelings when he’s in a situation where Naruto no longer loves him. It’s a constant theme of his life. He only realizes what he had when he loses it. Maybe if he was a better man he would have kept his new feelings to himself. Naruto had just gotten over him and he had no right to waltz back into his life to demand more when not even a month ago he was actively pushing Naruto away for his own feelings. Maybe he wouldn’t have felt so sure Naruto would choose him despite the fact Naruto had just started dating Hinata. If he was a worse one he wouldn’t have left it alone when Naruto’s face went from confused to angry at what he was trying to do. He’s crossed enough lines.

Or more cracky where kakashi (that doesn’t love Naruto) is absolutely bewildered because technically, nothing this Naruto does is different. He still smiles the same way. Still talks and walks and acts the same way. Touches him the same amount. It just…feels different? So now he’s completely second guessing his whole conclusion making skills because ain’t no way Naruto’s in love with him. But he could have swore..? Maybe he wasn’t? He remembers seeing all the signs but the signs are still there but lack all the feelings he’s been attributing to them??? W h a t. Aka how kakashi signs himself up for some remedial classes for interpreting others emotions from their actions bc clearly he’s cracked.

And oh blessed angst bc part of Naruto really really wants to say he wants his kakashi back but for all intents and purposes, the two are the exact same with just the one difference. And this one loves him. And since it was a body swap his kakashi is still in a peaceful world with the same friends and family. He’d probably even like it better since that Naruto wouldn’t make him so uncomfortable and force him to keep his distance to avoid encouraging him.

Kakashi from a universe where he loves Naruto but knows it won’t be returned is body swapped with the kakashi from a universe where Naruto loves kakashi and knows it won’t be returned.

Naruto manages to sus out the changes first because while things are the same everywhere else, this kakashi actually looks at him.

In the eye when he speaks instead of down at his book, watches when he’s not looking, pays attention to his training…and when he goes to watch kakashi in turn he starts catching his eyes.

It’s…it’s nice to be watched by the one person Naruto has always looked to.

It’s also wrong because nothing he’s done could have earned this attention. This affection in his sensei’s chakra. Not so quickly, not so intensely. It’s not his sensei.

[mrsshabana]

𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐚 𝐁𝐨𝐬𝐬 - 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟓

ꔫ‧₊ Summary The business trip is coming to an end, and Gyutaro has to face the reality of the situation and the consequences of his actions. When the two of you return to the office, he tries to pretend that things are normal. But the facade doesn't last, and he can't keep up the act. ꔫ‧₊ Content Gyutaro x female!reader, 18+ MDNI, Modern au, Boss & secretary relationship, Gyutaro is married, age gap, angst, smut, vaginal sex, creampie, cheating. ꔫ‧₊ Note 1.9k words.

✧:･ﾟ→ Chapter 1 ✧:･ﾟ→ Chapter 2 ✧:･ﾟ→ Chapter 3 ✧:･ﾟ→ Chapter 4 ✧:･ﾟ→ AO3

It felt like a dream when Gyutaro woke up.

Not only did he have the most peaceful and fulfilling sleep of his life, but he woke up with a warm feeling in his chest. For the first time in years, he didn’t feel an ounce of stress. Like everything is right in the world. 

But when he registers that the warmth at his side is actually your nude body tucked under his arm, the panic begins to set in.

“What have I done…” he whispers to himself as the reality of the situation dawns on him. Not only did he cheat on his wife, but he also slept with his secretary. 

He quietly sits up, looking down at you with soft eyes. Watching as your chest slowly rises and falls. 

He should’ve walked away. But he didn’t. And honestly, he didn’t want to. He knows what he did was wrong, but no matter how much he tries, he feels no regret. Last night was the most magical night of his life. Not only did he receive the love that he’s craved for years, but he also spent the night with someone who genuinely likes him for who he is. Not for the money or power. Just for Gyutaro. 

As the memories of the previous night begin to fill his mind, a blush spreads across his cheeks. He really didn’t hold back last night. It’s been so long since he’s had sex, the tension within himself was immense. All of it pouring out in hard thrusts and deep moans. 

“I hope I didn’t hurt her… dammit I should have controlled myself better,” he thinks to himself. 

“Good morning…” you mutter, turning to look at him as you pull the blanket over your chest. 

He freezes. His eyes meet yours in a nervous, self-deprecating stare. 

“I-I’m sorry,” his voice low and hoarse, “I shouldn’t have… I let myself get carried away.”

“Hey, it’s ok,” you say as you place your hand on his shoulder, “I don’t regret it. Unless you didn’t mean any of it…”

“It’s not that!” he says quickly, “I meant all of it, I really did. But I’m still a married man. Even if it’s hollow and broken. And you’re still my employee…”

“Gyutaro, I really like you. Like really, really like you. And I know you didn’t come to me for something meaningless. I know how it seems on paper, but I know you care. And I know you’re hurting.”

“It’s just that… you make me feel like I matter,” his voice cracks as he speaks, “Do you know how rare that is?��

You can’t help but smile, “Well, you do matter to me. A lot.”

He blushes as you lean over and kiss him softly, “We should probably get ready,” you whisper. Not wanting the moment to end, but you both have a lot of events to attend today as the conference is nearing its end. 

Once Gyutaro puts his suit and tie back on, it’s like he’s putting on a mask. He changes from the man you were intimate with last night and transforms into the cold and calculating business professional that you’re used to seeing at work. 

But even with that mask on, you see glimpses of Gyutaro’s true self throughout the day. He just can’t help it when you’re around. Occasionally laughing under his breath if you say something funny. Or catching you when you almost trip and fall. Even when other men stare at you for a moment too long, you can see Gyutaro clench his jaw. 

The rest of the trip goes by quickly, but it isn’t unpleasant. During the day, things are business as usual. But behind closed doors, Gyutaro is sweet and attentive. Almost like a boy trying to impress a girl he has a crush on. If people could see through the walls, they’d think that the two of you were a couple in the early stages of a relationship. 

Even on the plane ride back, he holds your hand like he means it. Squeezing it tighter when there’s turbulence because it makes him nervous. A woman sitting across the aisle even comments on what a cute couple the two of you are. Causing both of you to blush and go silent. 

The two of you don’t want the trip or your time alone together to end. But it’s inevitable that you’ll have to return to work and pretend like you and Gyutaro don’t have feelings for each other.

~

The first day back in the office is filled with nerves and repressed emotions. 

Gyutaro walks into his office as usual, briefcase in hand. Sitting at his desk and going over the meticulously crafted schedule that you put together for him. 

“Good morning, Mr. Shabana,” you say, putting on your best corporate smile as you hand him his coffee. 

For some reason, hearing you call him Mr. Shabana again feels so unnatural in his ears. So different from the way you would reverently whisper his name during your nights alone together on the trip. 

“G-Good morning,” he stutters, not sure how to behave around you now that things have changed. 

“You have a meeting this morning with Douma. He wanted to go over some numbers with you and catch you up on everything you missed. And this afternoon, you have another meeting with a potential client.”

“Alright, thank you.”

You turn to leave the room, but before you walk away, he calls out to you. 

“And Miss L/N,” he says, “Would you mind coming to my office before you go home for the evening?”

You can’t help but blush, “Y-Yes, sir.”

As the work day goes on, you feel like your mind is elsewhere. You’re barely able to focus on any of your tasks as all you can think about is Gyutaro and what he could possibly want you to come to his office for. 

The worst possible scenario is the first thing that comes to mind. Maybe he’s going to break things off with you and choose his wife. It’s a silly thought, you think. You shouldn’t be mad at him for choosing her; she is married to him after all. And you know it’s wrong to want him to choose you, but you can’t help it. The feelings that the two of you share are complicated, even more so because of the situation that you’re in. Or maybe he’s going to fire you. You don’t know which one is worse, honestly. 

When the end of the day comes, and all of the other employees clock out and leave the building, you knock sheepishly on Gyutaro’s door. 

“Come in,” his voice calls from inside.

“You wanted to see me, sir,” you say with a shaky voice as you approach his desk. 

“Yes,” he sighs and stands from his seat. Walking to stand in front of you, the height difference and him being so close makes you even more nervous. 

But to your surprise, his face softens. And instead of your boss, he looks like the man you flirted with on the beach, the man who kissed you like you were the only woman to ever love him. 

He hugs you tightly, the tension in his muscles finally relaxing for the first time all day. And he just holds you. 

“I don’t know if I can keep pretending…” he mutters.

“You don’t have to, Gyutaro,” you whisper as you hold him in your arms. You know he’s hurting and that this isn’t easy for him. 

It’s like your words change something for him. Something deep and unspoken. 

He looks into your eyes and catches your lips in a tender kiss. Full of soft emotions and honest truths. And you gladly accept his affection. Gently touching the side of his face as he holds you close. 

But the kiss turns from slow and sweet to deep and hungry. 

It’s only natural for a man who's been starved of affection for so long to want more. To crave it. 

His body moves on its own as he leads you over to his desk, picking you up and placing you to sit atop the edge of his desk. His hands caressing your thighs as he hikes up your skirt and nestles his hips between your legs. 

He groans as you pull him closer, snaking your hands across his chest to unbutton his shirt. And he does the same to you, unbuttoning your blouse and immediately palming your breasts. 

Everything moves quickly, filled with passion and unrestrained lust. It’s not long before Gyutaro is hastily unbuckling his belt and pulling out his hard cock. 

He moves your panties to the side, gathering your slick on his fingers and slowly rubbing them between your folds. Leaning forward, he whispers, “Are you ready, baby?”

“Mh-hm,” you whimper, “I-I’m ready.”

He kisses you one last time before pushing his hips forward and sliding into you. His breath hitches as he bottoms out, stopping to let you adjust to him while he enjoys the way your velvety walls squeeze him tightly. 

His movements are slower than the first time you slept with him. More controlled and maybe more meaningful too. Less of a heat-of-the-moment type of thing, and more of an “I love and care about you” type of thing.

He buries his face into the crook of your neck as he picks up the pace. Kissing and nibbling your neck as he revels in your soft moans and whimpers. 

“That’s it, baby,” he whispers as he reaches down between your legs to rub tight circles into your clit, “You’re taking me so well. Doing so good for me.” 

“ Ngh! Gyu, m’gonna…” you gasp and clutch onto him tighter. 

“Shh, it’s ok. Go ahead, baby. I’ll cum with you.”

He speeds up when he feels your walls fluttering around his thick shaft. It only takes a few seconds for you to unravel beneath him. You moan his name and tighten your legs around his hips as your entire body shudders as you’re hit by waves of pleasure. 

Gyutaro quickly follows, his grip tightening on your thighs as his hips stutter. “ Fuck, ngh… Y/N ,” he wimpers as he fills you with his hot sticky cum. Rope after rope shooting out of him, you can feel his warmth spreading inside of you. 

He holds you in a tight embrace as the two of you catch your breath. 

“Am I an idiot for falling in love with you…?” you whisper, a hint of sadness in your voice. You don’t know where it came from, but suddenly you feel like maybe you’re nothing more than a mistress. You hate that that word describes the type of relationship that you have with Gyutaro, but it’s the truth. If you could change things, you’d want to be his girlfriend. Maybe some day even more. But right now, you really don’t know what the future holds. 

“Of course not,” Gyutaro says, his voice filled with genuine concern as he looks into your eyes. “When I get home, I’m going to schedule a meeting with my lawyer, ok? I’m taking our relationship seriously, Y/N. I promise.”

“Ok…” you bury your face into his chest and choose to believe that he’s serious about divorcing his wife for you. 

“Because I’m falling for you too…” he admits, “And I don’t want what we have to go to waste.”

[skibasyndrome]

2. “i’ll go slow/i’ll be gentle” 🤝

Hi anon!!! Thank you so much for sending me this fun prompt!!

finally getting to it and in the spirit of Simon's birthday month we're having another Simon POV ficlet. I diiiid twist the prompt around a little bit, but I hope you end up liking what I did with it 👀💜💜💜

cw: nfsw; to set the scene: they never got back together, but meet again a little later in life and a... not quite friends with benefits situation ensues; exes to lovers possibly maybe <3

Simon is going to lose his mind. He hangs his head and groans in frustration when Wille still doesn't fucking make a move. He's starting to get antsy, fingers digging into the thin sheets he's resting on. Wille gets like this sometimes, takes out the speed when they could be fucking going further already, and Simon can't stand it, wants him to finally come closer and wants them to do what they do best. Simon doesn't like the waiting, doesn't like the getting to think when he knows that thinking about what they're doing here is going to lead him down a complicated path.

Bad enough that he has to think of excuses to tell his friends and roommate for why he can't join their game night, bad enough that he has to think of excuses when someone catches him afterwards, tangled up hair and hot cheeks. Simon comes here to stop thinking for a little while, comes here to pretend, for a small period of time, that he can have it all. Wille's hand just moves up and over his back, warm and light and leaving goosebumps in its wake, while the other, fingers slick, holds him open for a moment that lasts too long for Simon to handle. Because he's thinking again, still, and he can't afford to think about the way Wille touches him. "Wille... ," he whines, the audible impatience making him want to bury his face in Wille's pillow. He shuffles back a few centimeters in hopes that Wille will finally just fucking get it. But no such luck. Simon gasps involuntarily when Wille's fingertips brush over his hole again, too soft to be doing anything, entirely unnecessary because he's ready, has been for minutes. A dangerous cocktail of arousal and embarrassment pools in his stomach when another gentle, gentle, gentle brush of Wille's fingers over where he's exposed and slick and waiting desperately rips a moan from his throat. "Wille," he tries, once he's recovered, more sternly now. All he gets in response is a hum. And fingers that are too soft, are too light, are too slow trailing up the top of his spine, over the line of his shoulder. He lets out a long, frustrated noise, fighting through the heady feelings, fighting back that silly, stupid, no good small voice in the back of his mind that tells him to lean into it. Like it doesn't know that he can't get used to this, can't get attached again. "Wille, can't you just-" Simon's complaint is cut short when Wille's hands suddenly land on his hips, firm and determined and warm. Wille shuffles closer, slots his body against Simon's in a way that makes Simon's heart plummet. He forgets how to breathe for a moment, too caught up in the sudden proximity, the weight of Wille's frame, the warmth, the nagging little feeling of something like comfort trying to force its way to the forefront of his mind. Wille's body moves against his when Wille sighs deeply, and Simon quickly sucks in a deep breath.

Kneeling in front of Wille, exposed and waiting and being touched all-too-gently was bad, but this might be worse. Because Wille is so close that Simon is briefly scared that he could hear one of Simon's ridiculous thoughts. Like the realization that... this... whatever it may be, cuddling maybe, being held, feels so familiar that it cuts right into Simon's heart. Every breath he tries to get into his lungs, tries to make his ribcage expand with, only brings their bodies closer, only makes him painfully, achingly aware of every part of Wille that is touching a part of him. The soft skin of his chest to Simon's back, the warm muscles of his legs against Simon's thighs, the hard line of his cock against the cleft of Simon's ass. Simon feels Wille's breath, the movement of his mouth, before he hears his words, mumbled into the skin of his shoulder, as if it's something he doesn't really want Simon to hear. "Why do we always have to rush?" It punches every last, desperately worked for breath out of Simon's lungs. His arms suddenly feel too weak to hold himself up. As if he's sensing it, Wille shifts his weight, rests less of it on Simon. Simon wants to beg him to stay, but quickly scolds himself for it. But even with less of Wille's weight on him, Simon doesn't have an answer. Not one that doesn't make him sound pathetic and bitter and vengeful and like an asshole. There's no good reason for them to rush through this every time, for Simon to rip Wille's clothes off as soon as he walks in, for Simon to rush to get back into his own as soon as his breathing has somewhat normalized. There's no good reason for him to withhold what their younger selves were so desperate for, but never really got enough of, no reason to cut the after and the before and the during as short as they do.

Simon grips the fabric more tightly, knuckles turning white, desperately trying to keep himself from saying something stupid. "I...," he starts, but stops immediately, embarrassed of the waver in his voice. "Don't know," he says then, like that means anything at all. He feels Wille nod against his shoulder blade, feels a line of kisses pressed up his spine. Despite himself, he leans into it, curves his back to get closer to Wille. To this stupidly gentle man that has always been so tied up in Simon's heartbreak and so tied up in his love that, maybe, he never really fully managed to move on. Maybe this isn't Simon trying to and failing not to fall back into old patterns that will inevitably get him hurt. Maybe it's never been gone. Maybe the ache and the want and the love are all one. One messy, ugly, beautiful, warm, fuzzy concoction that is making it so hard to tear himself away each time. Simon swallows hard. Wille moves his hands, gently tracing the lines of Simon's waist, stroking up and down his sides. He lets out another sigh, so beaten down that Simon wants to turn around and wrap him in his arms and never let him go again. Fuck. "Can I... I mean, I don't know..." He sounds so insecure, so out of his depth. It makes something uncomfortable well up in Simon's chest. "Can I go slow? Just this one time?" Wille's clean hand moves up and sinks into Simon's hair, fingers pressing comforting circles into his skull. And Simon knows he's lost. Knows he never stood a chance, not against himself. "Wanna feel you, Simon," Wille breathes, and lands the final punch. He sounds desperate, broken, like he knows he can't have what he's asking for. "Wanna really feel you..." Fuck. Simon wants this, too, fuck, wants all of it. The thought of Wille taking his time sinking into Simon, moving slowly, letting both of them feel every second. It's dangerous, it's wonderful, it makes it hard for Simon to catch his breath.

Simon nods weakly, then more fervently. Shifts closer, presses himself against Wille, shimmies his hips to grind back against Wille's cock, settles in his arms. "Please..." Wille tightens his grip on him, and Simon nods again. "Yeah?" Wille sounds breathless with surprise, sounds beautiful, sounds like happy memories and like what Simon's always wanted. There's a flutter in his chest, soft and nervous. But maybe he should take the leap. So he takes a breath. "Please, you can go slow," Simon mumbles, but it feels like he's screaming at the top of his lungs, falling free.

Feel free to send me some prompts from that list, or just make some up <3 Or read my other ficlets here

also pls let me know what you think <3

[ni-namutree]

foxes prank war pt 2

the thing about nicky is that hes surrounded by walking talking true crime cases. son of a serial killer, cult victim, drug addict(s), serial rape survivors, ex gang member turned girl savior, the list goes on and on.

and unfortunately, put next to them he might as well be the poster boy of a good and normal life. hes a loud and proud gay with a sexy foreign boyfriend that is known for his, if crass and vulgar, sunshine personality. or i guess as “sunshine” as being part of a group called the “monsters” gets.

the crux of the matter is that hes very aware of his situation. he knows thats he has it the easiest and honestly, yea its a trauma competition. especially when most of them deal with their problems with a vodka bottle, cracker dust, or an exy racket.

its not like his trauma is a secret, i mean not technically. its just easy to forget with all the things thats happened and is still happening. plus hes probably the most adjusted of the monsters so its fine. hes fine. (shut up he doesnt sound like neil he really means it)

hes healed or at least healing. he goes to therapy (fine, alright you caught him, its the mandatory sessions with bee. but he shows up and actually talks so that should really be good enough) and sure maybe he cant look at trees or the wilderness too much but hes in palmetto, theres not many around to haunt him.

and when his skin feels tight and twitches from lack of movement or exercise he just waits until exy practice. no one can tell ur an exercise junkie if youre a student athlete and literally everyone around you is 100x worse.

so pray away the gay camp was a shit mix of wilderness camp therapy and bible school, it happens. did it feel like military school? i guess in terms of physical activity. but nicky is pretty sure the military at least got fed and got to bathe once in awhile. if he gave one shit about his country, maybe hed sign up for the marines or something. but after drake why would he serve for a country that didnt even believe people like him should exist. whether hes referring to the gay or mexican part is still to be determined.

the point is: hes adjusted. kinda. hes adjusted enough. look hes perfectly fine. if everyone could stop asking…right. right. no one is asking. because no one knows hes one comment away from an andrew level crashout. he just has to hold out until he can see erik again. erik will fix everything like always.

he was coping pretty well actually, yk until someone shaved his head while he was sleeping. it wasnt even that much. it was just a stripe on the left side of his head with a high guard. unfortunately, it turns out he was actually a haircut away from a neil level crashout. he might have seen it in the mirror the next morning and then immediately gave himself a buzzcut. he doesnt remember doing it, he thinks he disassociated. bee said it was normal with his type of trauma. hes not even certain where he got a hair clipper. all he knew was that one moment he had a head full of hair and the other his hand was rubbing soft fuzz on his skull.

its chill tho hes fine. its just a haircut. fully does not remind him of the woods. nope. hes not feeling phantom hunger pains and his throat is absolutely not dry from thirst.

…so maybe he grabbed an extra granola bar to give to adam, the poor kid is 9 years old, he needs food. he was hungry, he just said that. why wouldnt he grab an extra snack? he has class soon anyway. he might get hungry or kidnapped and dropped off in the middle of the woods with a backpack and a bible again

“oh wow nicky, i’m liking the hair, man”

nicky looks up to see matt gawking at him, mouth slightly agape. he smirks, “think im sexy, do you matty boy? you know if dan ever wants to share” he waggles his eyebrows.

matt lets out as huff of laughter. “honestly? i think neil’s really he only man she’d let into our bed”

nicky cant help but laugh at that.

“what.” the man of the hour.

neil looks in confusion, first at matt and then at nicky.

nicky shifts a little from foot to foot, rubbing the back of his head. at least the feeling was soothing. “surprise :D” he says

neil squints at him. “what does “colon Capital D” mean?”

nicky sighs exaggeratedly. “kid, you depress me”

many things depress him. neil’s lack of normal life experience falls weirdly high on that list (bee would say its suppression but that doesnt matter bc mandatory sessions arent for another two weeks anyway”

tbc

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[chemicallywrit]

A very happy Audio Drama Sunday to everyone, I am...super behind. I'm not sure how that happened, but I have like, five audio drama episodes this week that I did not get around to listening to (so no one tell me what happens on Old Gods of Appalachia this week), and YET! And yet, an absolute wealth of episodes were given to us nevertheless, I have more than enough to write about. Let's go!

��� Anytime Tin Can Audio rolls up with a show, I find myself enchanted. The methods of storytelling are always fresh with Amber Devereux. So I was HYPED for @landsendpod, and I was still blown away! HECK. Bibi June is a killer writer. Land's End is setting up a fascinating dichotomy between those who care strongly about land and those who give care to the land. As an American I'm familiar with land-back movements on this side of the Atlantic, so I find this particular setup both unfamiliar and intriguing. All of this is of course just an interesting thematic background for the mysteries our Shepherd finds himself embroiled in, both ancillary to and growing inside his flock, and this I am watching with equal fascination. Hop on board this show while it's new, you will not regret it.

✨ I personally find it really annoying when a fantasy story does a bunch of front-loading of worldbuilding before you even get to meet any characters, so I love the way @levianpodcast-desperado is scaffolding their exposition. Of COURSE the Tanathea is desperately scrabbling for power--the Tellaris used to have access to a powerful and strange magic all their own. I should have expected as much from Samy Soussi, but the way this story is introducing colonialism as a secret, creeping evil is gorgeous. I'm excited to see how Valentin, a less conniving Tellari, is exposed to this oceanic magic, and how it changes him.

☢️ Oh dang! Hearthbound with the twist! Finding ourselves not just on a lonesome journey, but in a post-apocalyptic road trip world, really resonates in a way with the original Odyssey that I find beautiful. The Odyssey is a post-apocalypse in a way--everyone Odysseus knows is dead, the largest power in the world has fallen, razed to the ground, and all he wants is the comfort of home. The move to make Hearthbound embrace those ideas with Odessa is genius. It's an especially cool application when we're introduced to Calypso. And as always, the music makes me cry.

👻 I love when @hellofromthehallowoods messes with its format. The urgency of this final confrontation in Scout City is just exacerbated with freakin gods bothering Nikignik all the time. The way this show deals with scale, with the fact that our narrator could be watching anything or everything else, and the fact that as bad as this huge riot is, it's still so, so small...man, it's masterful.

🍞 You know, when Bellamy Pink said, “Someday we’ll be rich enough to be good people," boy...I felt that. These past few weeks I've been thinking a lot about debt, how it makes you desperate and crazy, how survival mode forces you into situations where there are no good options. @killjamxxx is so perfect for delivering this message; between the fabulous gore and funny characters and colorful worldbuilding, there is a little voice that says, "Hey, look at these people whose only option is risking death or salvation. That's real. It's happening right now." And it's especially good that the little voice is often delivered through Faustina. It isn't a weakness to have principles. Especially when you also have an axe.

‼️Hey! Inn Between is hosting a joke contest! If you have a joke that would fit into a fantasy world, get up in there! (Please help me. I am good at many things, but not jokes.)

That's it for this week! Enter our joke contest and we'll see you next Sunday!

[fallen-w1ngs]

About the the germaphobe ask: I’m sorry I didn’t mean to confuse you! 😭 I forgot to put that it was a request for the Thunderbolts crew

ITS ALL GOOD 🩵 !!! sorry for not getting to ya till just now :'3

'' GERMAPHOBE ,,

|| pairings : (individual) the new avengerz + germaphobe!reader

|| warnings : none !

|| if some of these seem ooc it's cz idk how to write them, im sorry 💔 also, thw characters are written in alphabetical order

ALEXEI SHOSTAKOV :

|| Alexei is, surprisingly, one of the most understanding ones in the group when you bring up doing a deep clean. Being stuck in a Russian prison for god knows how long, he knows how it's like to live in less than ideal living situations.

|| Does this make him the cleanest person to live with? Not by a long shot. But, when you speak up about how you don't do well with the messiness, he tries more to make less of a mess. He will also lift any heavy object you need him to too get into the nooks and crannies.

|| In my head, when you bring up the idea of deep cleaning, this is what he says: "Deep clean? Oh! Yes, yes! I mean, the mess adds personality, and it's not as bad as Russian prison, but I will help! Because we are team!"

AVA STARR:

|| She's the most quiet one to help you out, part of me actually thinks she'd start cleaning even before you bring up the deep cleaning idea. Ava, just doing her thing, would notice how your nose would scrunch up at the pile of rubbish Alexei would leave around. Or how you'd avoid touching the empty soda cans, dirtied napkins, and empty bowls that would be left over from a night of team bonding.

|| When you do bring up the idea, she gives a solid nod and starts going to work with it. Utilizing her phasing ability to look into smaller spaces and see if it's absolutely disgusting or up to your standards.

|| Her response to the idea: "Oh, yeah sure. Walker is disgusting to live around, so I see why you'd want to do a deep clean- maybe we could contact Val to hire some people to help out?"

ROBERT "BOB" REYNOLDS:

|| Lowkey, he's a germaphobe too. Though he doesn't have as much motivation as you do to do full on deep cleans, but he hates leaving things out to stay dirty. Dishes, laundry, bedrooms. While ya'll are out on missions, he stays back at the Watchtower and cleans up some parts of the tower he notices. As well as makes everyones bed, no peaking or snooping of course.

|| When you ask him to do a deep clean together while the rest of the team are out for some work, he is ecstatic. He's never really gotten chances to do deep cleans or lived in the cleanest enviroment, so even the idea of cleaning alongside you, making the Watchtower a clean home for the team? Dude, he's already grabbing the mop and gloves.

|| His response when given the idea: "Wait really? I'd love to! It has been getting pretty messy lately.. I'd love to do a deep clean with you! W-We could put some of the music you like on the speakers.!"

JAMES "BUCKY" BARNES:

|| Bucky doesn't care that much for messes, of course he'd rather not live in a dumpster, but he's used to the small messes. Not tidy living room, bedroom with a few articles of clothing sprawled on the floor. That sort of stuff, he thinks it makes the Watchtower seem more lived in. In the 30s, of course, he was chastised by his ma to not have a messy room so it was a habit to clean up, but again, he doesn't mind the mess.

|| When you brought up the idea of doing a deep clean in passing, not directed to him, the freetime he found he went out to the store and bought the cleaning supplies.. Though it was hard with how many options there were, back in his day it was either bar soap or nothing.

|| When you brought up the idea, he didn't say anything, he just gave a small nod and went to work. Very much still in that soldier mentailty to finish the job. Later on while cleaning, he'd say something like: "I never really got the chance to do this before.. Before and after.." He paused, giving a small shrug. "This was fun. We should do this again."

JOHN WALKER:

|| I'm not saying he's ignorant, but he doesn't really get why you're a germaphobe. It's just a bit of messes, but then again, he does understand why you absolutely hate messes. Having been on multiple tours in the army as well as having a kid, messes are.. Well, they're not pleasant.

|| When you did bring it up to him, he was skeptical and asked "Why not just get Val to hire a team?" And you said you wanted to do it as well as spend some time with him. That's what got him.

|| While you guys cleaned, if you were in seperate rooms he'd use comms, he'd ramble on and on about his life. Which was interesting!! He didn't talk much about his achievements or wins as much as you'd expect, no, he talked more about his family and Lemar and Lemar's family. He did cry a little when he talked about his ex-wife and his son, but you were there to help him out. All in all, deep cleaning with Walker turned into a therapy session lowkey.

YELENA BELOVA:

|| Yelena was trained in the Red Room to be a perfect widow and assassin, of course she noticed how you squirmed a bit when finding a pile of trash that the team had decided to forget about. Instead of you going to her to bring the idea of deep cleaning the tower, she brought it to you. Thinking that it'd be something good for you.

|| When she brought the idea up, she already bought out the cleaning aisle at the local superstore... That's half joking. She watched as your eyes lit up with excitement and you both got to work real quickly.

|| While you were cleaning, she'd talk about how this team is a bunch of slobs like the pigs her mother raised, she talked about how Natasha would've hated how the Watchtower looked now and how she would've helped redecorate. It was a lot of talking about Natasha and her childhood, before the Red Room. By the end of cleaning, she said in a softer tone "You deserve to feel comfortable too, sorry it's hard to live with us," Of course, the last bit was more of a sarcastic joke. "Anyways, I have a bunch of ideas for next time we do this!" And she'd talk about how shit some of the products they used were.

|| SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO WRITE THIS 🙏🙏🙏 PLEASE FORGIVE ME 😞

[qoldenskies]

What do you think about the turtles having kids? Which of them do you think would want to? :>

going to me for silly hcs, just reminder that im not doing in-depth analysis via watching the show or anything, everything i say is gonna be Vibes,,,

anyway donnie and mikey. i think donnie (unless saddled with being a single parent situation again) would have dreams of starting a family (even if he ended up with a male partner, or multiple partners), he's a hopeless romantic type. i think parenting would STRESS HIM THE HELL OUT but he would absolutely adore certain aspects of it. ripping people apart at the PTA meetings. tea parties. fussing to make them look presentable. helping them grow into themselves and learn how the world works,, i do think donnie likes teaching people things, but he would be pretty impatient or overwhelmed if he was a teacher. but he could probably balance like 1-3 kids. also he'd be such a girldad

as for mikey, i just,, see him doing it?? either as a close uncle that's essentially a third parent or a single parent (cant see him having a relationship, but i could see him with children) or even just like. a crazy cat lady with like 6 of them as his child replacements lmao. i think its kind of an interesting and unexpected idea for him to go from Family Baby to a parent ... and i think he would be pretty good at it.

as for leo and raph, i cant really see it in the good timeline. although i do think the task of raising cj was more evenly split (leo just got the most focus because he was the leader of the resistance, one of the only ones left alive, and his mentor, which is probably something that only started when he was a little older) leo really had to grow into the idea. tbh i generally only see him and cj getting super close around cj's preteen or younger teen years, because leo just does not strike me as the type of person who would like kids very much. he'd be GOOD with kids, but he would not like them. i think especially if baby cj was a little bastard leo would have beef with that thang

and raph just needs to rest lol. i think he wouldnt be opposed to it if he had a partner that was interested in it but it wouldnt be something he'd actively seek out. he'd be a GREAT uncle though. he gets the experience in small doses through taking care of his siblings' kids and that's really good enough for him